Christianity -- Christian Living/relationship with grown children
If your grown children say they are christian, but their lifestyle doesn't show it-- are you not to associate with them. In scripture it says that if someone says they are your brother, but are living in sin---have nothing to do with them. Does this go for your children as well?
Messiah YAHSHUA made it clear who exactly were HIS family saying, "“And while He was still talking to the crowds, see, His mother and brothers stood outside, seeking to speak with Him. And one said to Him, “See, Your mother and Your brothers are standing outside, seeking to speak with You.” But He answering, said to the one who spoke to Him, “Who is My mother and who are My brothers?” And having stretched out His hand toward His taught ones, He said, “See My mother and My brothers! “For whoever does the desire of My Father who is in the heavens is My brother and sister and mother.””
Matthew 12:46-50 ISR98
HE also made it clear what HIS FATHER'S will is, saying, "““And He who sent Me is with Me. The Father has not left Me alone, for I always do what pleases Him.” As He was speaking these words, many believed in Him. So יהושע said to those Yehuḏim who believed Him, “If you stay in My Word, you are truly My taught ones, and you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.””
John 8:29-32 ISR98
Now, some suggest that YAHSHUA had HIS own "Word", HIS own set of commands, apart from HIS FATHER'S. So, in order for us to be able to understand what HE means by always doing that which pleases HIM (The FATHER), it must be established whether there two standards or simply one. This is important for you to consider when trying to determine exactly WHO is doing "the desire of My (YAHSHUA'S) FATHER... And who may think that they are, but in truth, (according to HIS WORD), are not.
Consider what John says regarding this delemma; “And by this we know that we know Him, if we guard His commands. The one who says, “I know Him,” and does not guard His commands, is a liar, and the truth is not in him. But whoever guards His Word, truly the love of Elohim has been perfected in him. By this we know that we are in Him. The one who says he stays in Him ought himself also to walk, even as He walked. Beloved, I write no fresh command to you, but an old command which you have had from the beginning. The old command is the Word which you heard from the beginning.”
I John 2:3-7 ISR98
There were then, as there are now, those who do not walk as YAHSHUA walked, keeping HIS FATHER'S Commands, doing HIS desire, and are deceived into thinking that their lawless traditional religion will save them. Of such belief we see a traditional minded religious teacher speaking to the Master about the vast difference between the two. Consider;
“יהושע answered and said to him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born from above, he is unable to see the reign of Elohim.” Naḵdimon said to Him, “How is a man able to be born when he is old? Is he able to enter into his mother’s womb a second time and be born?” יהושע answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he is unable to enter into the reign of Elohim. “That which has been born of the flesh is flesh, and that which has been born of the Spirit is spirit. “Do not marvel that I said to you, ‘You have to be born from above.’”
John 3:3-7 ISR98
So from this we can see that on this earth there two basis for family relationship;
1. From being born once; In Adam. (Living religiously, and/or non-religiously, there is no scriptural distinction), but not in accordance to HIS WORD, HIS TRUTH, HIS COMMANDS.
2. From being born twice; ONCE in Adam AND THEN In YAHSHUA! (With the proof of that rebirth exhibited through the desire and power by HIS SPIRIT to walk as YAHSHUA walked, doing HIS FATHER'S desire, guarding, keeping, observing HIS Commands...
So, you must now determine on which basis it is that you are trying to use as the one with which to establish relationship with your family.
If both parties are only born once, (living traditionally but not biblically) then you will be able to coexist on that basis, neither of you doing the desire of The FATHER...
if one party is born twice, living and walking as YAHSHUA walked, there will be a struggle to maintain any real substance in the relationship, but unless there has been official action taken by the leadership of your church against your offspring for their disdainful, despising, Word rejecting, sinful behavior, your responsibility continues (as their parent) to exemplify a lifestyle that points them to HIS TRUTH, HIS WORD, HIS COMMANDMENTS...
I pray HIS FAVOR to you as you walk according to HIS WORD! MY your life be fruitful! And May YAHWEH bless your family in peace and harmony!