Expert: Dr Eddy Cheong - 11/20/2006

Question
Yes, i v been badly abused, i even do not know where to cry and my tears r actually dry now, i just can not move on my life, i believe in Jesus, but i maybe really need couseling, but i v tried to do it already, i maybe not found right yet. and something v detail and personal I even do not know how to talk to counselor.


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The text above is a follow-up to ...

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Thank u, I v asked a lot christians about "born again", they all say that when a person received Jesus, so he /she is already born again?


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I want to know why i m so addicted in abuse relationship, i v been in this kind all my life, but now i m still with a guy similar way, he abused about my age, means i m too old for him, also calling me prostitute sometimes, but i just do not know how to end this thing, still talk to him etc, i even do not understand myself,....I need help and wisdom in this matter...

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From your description I gather that your boyfriend is not a born again christian..
2 Cor 6:14-16

14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? 15 What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? 16 What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?
NIV
A yoke is a wooden harness that binds two cows together and more often than not (in a figurative sense) the yoke inevitably takes a believer along the direction of an unbeliever. Uniting a christian and non christian is like uniting light with darkness. Furthermore, marriage is also a spiritual union with God as the witness..
Mark 10:8-9
9 Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."
NIV
God can never join a believer with an unbeliever in matrimony (I use the word 'never')
A believer who marries a non believer becomes like a non believer, because his or her marriage is not sanctified by the Lord.

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1 Cor 7:39

39 The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.
KJV
NOTICE THE LAST SENTENCE 'ONLY IN THE LORD'
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I have an article on salvation at
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Troy/9519/salvation.html
Did you go through the process of repentance and faith in Jesus Christ and find your life changed? I hope you do not mind me asking but have you had a past history of a bad experience e.g. abused before (because this may require counselling).

Answer
You will need to find a bible believing church and good christian fellowship
_Acts 2:42
42 They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer.
NIV
Plus a sanctified life in Christ
Rom 12:1-2
12:1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God-this is your spiritual act of worship. 2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-his good, pleasing and perfect will.
NIV