Hi Good day! I'm asking you today to pray for my relationship. This guy was a collegue of mine and eventhough he left we still kept in touch for 10 years. Then we had a chance to meet up and we instantly hit it off. I knew that he is the one I've been praying for. What I really liked about him is he's also a christian and he was the one who encouraged me to go to chruch again. It was smooth sailing for 2 months then suddenly on our third month, we started to fight over small things. He then told me that he wasn't ready to be in a committed relationship. Nothing has changed much and we still go to church together.

Our worst fight took place last week. Even we're just friends, he still manages to text me. This time is different. I called him and he was drunk. He kept saying things that waas so hurtful and he said that he doesn't want to see me anymore. I couldn't believe what was happening just like that it's over.

I've been trying to reach out to him even asking him to be friends. He did reply and said that if being friends mean not requiring us to see each other constantly or going to church together or replying to my text. I just couldn't understand why he's being rude and hurtful. This is the first time that I really prayed for a relationship to be restored believing that God will heal our relationship. I'm asking you now to please pray for me and pray for us that our relationship will be restored. I believe in my heart that after all the failed relationships I've been though with God's love this relationship will be healed.

Please pray for me as I'm starting to lose faith that we will ever be ok. I'm just holding on to God's promise that whatever I ask in prayer if I believe that I have received it and it will be yours. Thank you again in advance. God bless and more power!

Dearest Jahoan,
Thank you for writing. I sense your frustration and heartache- relationships are tough.  But your friend has tried to be honest with you and I feel you are refusing to hear. He is not where you are - emotionally. You can't force love.  Nor will God force this young man to  love you just because this is what you want.
What if another young man 'decided' that you should belong to him? Do you really believe you would have no power over your own life?  That isn't what that scripture means or how God intended his children to use it.   Your friend is still trying to find himself and it sounds like he feels suffocated by you. He's trying to gently put out boundaries and he senses that you are not hearing him. He too, is frustrated.  The truth is, as I see it , dear one, is that your friendship is at risk.  You would do well to move on.  

I understand that that is not what you want to hear, who does?  Sometimes we want something so bad....., how can we be wrong.  But sweetie, read the Love Chapter  in Corinthians, hear what the Holy Spirit teaches about love.  The two of you are not walking this path. You're trying to put a square peg in a round hole.  I strongly suggest that you pray for wisdom and ask the Holy Spirit to make clear what is being said in the love chapter.  There are two lives to consider here and at risk is a precious friendship.

I know, dear one, that you don't want to hear this, but you need to move on and give this some space.  Treat your friend like you would like to be treated.  
Put the shoe on the other foot. Suppose  a young man was head over heels in love with you, but you didn't feel the same way.  You liked the young man, he was a good kid, but you just didn't feel 'that' way about him.  You tried to tell him... But he refused to hear. He believed if the two of you hung in long enough,
You would see that he was right.  You were pushed to your limit..... He became a drag.... You finally told him PLAINLY you do not want to be in a committed relationship.  He doesn't get it.  He fights for his dream- you are being pushed to your enth degree. The friendship is on the line.

Dear one, as I said before, you can not make someone love  you - but you can make them hate you.  Be wise and let the Spirit guide you through this.
Trust that God wants the best for the two of you.  If this relationship was right, this cruelty wouldn't be happening. Love is patient, kind, long- suffering....etc.
It does not want it's own way.....   Your friend is trying to say "I can't do rhis anymore."  Your friendship is ar stake.

Let me advise you ....... Move on and make new friends.  And I'm going to ask you to do something that only a truly mature individual can do. Don't disguss
Your feelings about this young man. Don't hang out your 'dirty' laundry and talk him down.  What I'm saying is, IF he was special enough for you to want to spend the rest of your life with him,  he is still that wonderful, special, person. Don't hurt him br your bad comments. That is love.

If you believe that this young man is God's choice for you then move on. Date, have fun, enjoy what life has to offer. Allow yourself to grow up  and move on to perfection. Let God be God.  Perhaps God has special plans for this young man.... And that's why he can't be in a committed relationship  right now. A house divided can't stand - God said.  

I hope I have shed some light on your heartache, special one. I know this is a very tough time for you.  I'm sorry.  God can, and will, put your broken heart back together, I promise. Put your focus on how God can use you.  There are those 'out there' that need your love - need your compassion. Go and carry their load and learn a deeper meaning to love. For you see sweetheart, life demands much from love....  It's not all clearly cut and dried. Sometimes life's demands calls for us to  be the one who carries the heaviest load, and we can with Christ at our side.  The more you learn about love the more you know the mind of God.
The very fact that you can't see the solution to your problem with this young man, tells you you need more of God's wisdom. You need to 'see' through the eyes of Jesus.  That means you must cultivate your relationship with Christ, submit to His will, and put your trust in Him.

These are not just words sweetie, it takes work to accomplish this.  You have to set your desires aside and know that God knows your dream, and you must submit to His will. Trust that He has a plan for you and it will lead to a beautiful life.

My prayers are with you.

Rev. Ramona Stonecipher


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Reverend Ramona Carlene Stonecipher


Hi! I am an ordained United Methodist Minister. I have served the Lord for some thirty years. I am a Bible Scholar, and have taught the Scriptures all of these years. I believe in prayer. I believe, and know by experience, that God answers prayers. I can help you understand what the Bible teaches about prayer, and guide you in how to have a more prayerful lifestyle. I can't tell you why God chooses to answer your prayers the way He does, but I can, through Scripture, show you that He does hear, and He does respond to His children.


Ordained Minister; Bible Scholar; Teacher; Leader of Prayer Groups; Counselor

Graduate with Master's Degree in Divinity (Saint Paul School of Theology)Kansas City, Missouri. Graduate: University of Nebraska

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