Christianity--Prayers/Marriage and signs

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Question
For the past five months I have been praying to date a certain girl. She got me out of the house more in five months then in five years. I met her children, taken them to lunch as well as her. We fight a lot yet always end up talking again. The past month I've been praying to marry her. And noticed signs or coincidences.

1. A man at the mall spoke to me about how he prayed and helped his hand. His hand showed no visible signs of healing to his doctor yet he can move it and no longer tskes pills.

2. A kid sitting next to me in the hallway in college started to listen to a couple talk about marriage restoration on the 700 Club.

3. I also found videos on YouTube talking about marriage restoration. One girl said she prayed for her parents to get back og ether after years of divorce and they did.

4. When I gave the girl and myself space for a while she came looking for me.

5. I sometimes see quotes on my Facebook telling me to have faith and keep at praying and hoping.

I don't know if these are signs or coincidences. I really care about her and would like to marry her. My faith is weak because I am a weak person. Any advice would help. I pray for her and me several times a day.

Answer
Dear, dear, Raul,
I'm sorry to disappoint you with what I have to say but these are not real signs or coincidences.  You sound desperate to have this work out but I see no good signs in what you say.  

First, never pray to date someone.  God does not have dates to give you.  He has qualities.  Think of all the good qualities that you admire in a person and then do your best to live those qualities every day.  That is what it is to honor God by living His likeness. Fighting is never a good sign, but a very bad one, even if you always make up.  

You need to practice your faith and not think of yourself as weak, but as a strong runner in the race.  If you think of yourself as weak than that means that you're acting like a push-over.  A woman with four children would need a very, very, strong husband.  It sounds to me like you are infatuated with her and that won't cut it.

Stop taking her out to lunch and fix meals at her house.  You need to see how the children respond to her under a variety of situations.  Everyone is on their best behavior when they're being taken out to lunch.

While at home with her, notice the children's habits.  Do they listen? have respect? eat healthy food? cry? complain? fight?  Don't buy them anything.  Offer to play games with them, work puzzles, paint and draw, teach them card games, board games and ask them to read to you or if they are too young, read to them and notice how they respond.  Can they be still?  Do they appreciate all of your efforts? or do they get bored easily and always want to know what they're going to get next?  

Suggest making a picnic lunch and taking it to the park.  You'll know more about her after a few sessions like that.  It takes a lot of work and effort to make an afternoon like that go smoothly.
And, what ever you do, do not be intimate with her as that causes all reason to go out of the window and clouds the thinking even more.

Best to you, and be careful.

Christianity--Prayers

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Marsha Cunningham

Expertise

I can offer ideas on what makes prayer effective. I pray all day, in different ways and expect results in the forms of ideas, guidance and protection.

Experience

My mother was raised with prayer and she raised her family with prayer. It was the foremost answer to our problems. As I became a teenager I often wanted other solutions and rebelled many times but later on in my life, as I began to raise my own family I realized the value and necessity of prayer first, listings and following. I am now a grandmother and have seen countless situations change in my family as a result of prayer. I also relied on prayer in my classroom, as a teacher, to see me through the many difficulties of spending 24 years in some of the roughest areas of a large city. I worked from the premise that all children are gifted, by God, and nothing could stand in the way of that unique expression. When facing difficult situations in helping parents and students I always asked them if they believed in God. They never responded in the negative; so I encouraged them to pray and gave them some brief ideas that had helped me. They were always grateful and together we saw changes.

Organizations
Forming a nonprofit, Art Improving Academics, and also part of a group which is interested in starting a charter school based on the ideas of all children being gifted and incorporating the arts to improve their academics.

Publications
Over the years of classroom experience, I wrote a textbook/handbook for beginning reading wherein is included the prayerful ideas I used to get the results I got.

Education/Credentials
I am a retired teacher of grades K-3rd, and have now started a pre-K in it's second year. I have a BA in art, clear elementary teaching credential, 21 units in Early Childhood. My students' test scores, above the 50th%tile in gang infested areas, speaks to the effectiveness of the measures I used, all inspired by prayer.

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