Expert: Carl Fuglein - 11/26/2008

Question
Hey, I have a question concerning dating/marriage a girl of different faith.  I am 14 and so there is this girl I like.  I am Presbyterian and she is Jewish.  What is your opinion on marriage with a woman of a different faith?  Is it against the Bible?  Can she still be a "Proverbs 31 woman" and be Jewish?  I am not going to marry her, but what should my outlook be if this is a reoccurrence?  Thanks for your time.

Answer
Hi Brett-

It IS against the Bible, but there is a wide interpretation of the verse in question:

(2 Cor 6:14 KJV)  Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?


A very strict interpretation of this means that we should have nothing to do with unbelievers - socially or in business.  Because this girl is Jewish, she does not believe that Jesus is the Messiah, and is therefore a non-believer.  The strict interpretation is that you should have nothing to do with her.

But I, and many others, argue the words "unevenly yoked" don't necessarily mean that we can't talk with or work with unbelievers, but that we should not partner with them in marriage or in business.

My personal belief is that unless we, as Christians, build relationships with non-believers, how will they ever hear the gospel message?

As for Proverbs 31 - that is part of Jewish scripture, so certainly she can be virtuous and all the other qualities.

Because you are so young and not anywhere near marriage, my advice to you is to go ahead and become friends with this girl.  Go to church with her, and have her come to church with you - learn all you can about one another's faiths.  But when it comes time to get married, unless one of you converts to the other's faith, it's probably not a good idea - church will always get in between your relationship, and church will generally lose.

hope this helps,

carl