Expert: Carl Fuglein - 9/27/2008

Question
Well am 19 yrear old college student,am a devorted christian but an issue disturbs me much,they say drinking will lead vto aggressivesness and lack of self control esp if u drink it in a wrong place like clubs or bars.I have drank alcohol on several occasions and the ones who are present say that i act better than the real me.My conscious,i could control it at that moment my character didnt change and to make the matter worst i even felt better than before SHOULD CONTINUE OR STOP

Answer
Denis-

Well first of all, I've got to tell you to stop, because it's against the law at your age.  It's against the law for a reason - your body, and your mind, are not mature enough to process the alcohol.  It doesn't sound like you're binge drinking, but my first recommendation will always be to follow the law and just don't do it.

That may not be enough to stop you.  Why do you think you're friends say, " you act better than the real me."  Do they even KNOW the real you?  Ask them what the heck they mean?  Alcohol will lessen, and sometimes even remove, inhibitions.  Maybe when you've had a few too many drinks you start talking some more and open up to them.  Maybe you act stupid and make them laugh.  Maybe you make them less guilty about drinking themselves.  I don't know the reason, but you need to find out.

There is nothing wrong with socializing, but you can socialize and have fun without drinking at all.  I was a binge drinker when I was your age, and into my 30's.  Did a lot of stupid things - mostly drove while I was drunk.  Stupid, stupid, stupid.  Impairment begins with the first drink. I think you should try an experiment one weekend - go with your friends and volunteer to be the designated driver, and don't drink ANY alcohol, and then watch your friends.  Watching someone else get drunk, act stupid, and throw up is far more entertaining than doing it yourself.  Maybe watching someone else will prevent you from doing the same.

I say STOP drinking until a) you're legal, and b) you understand how your personality changes when you drink - this is very important.  If you don't know how, then you're going to wind up doing some stupid stuff.  Trust me, I know.  And by all means, DO NOT DRINK AND DRIVE, no matter whether you think you can or not - you could wind up ruining several lives, including your own.  Just don't do it.

I have no problem with social drinking, which means 2 drinks or less, maybe 3.  Any more than that, you're asking for trouble.

Hope this helps.  Please take the time to rate my answer and feel free to ask followup questions if you need more info.

blessings,

carl