Expert: Dr Tim Gladu - 9/2/2008

Question
My youth group if basically falling apart. I have always been the leader out of the group since Im the oldest. I feel as if I NEED to do something to fix this. We have one girl that is causing problems. She is constantly talking bad about people and its causing people to get upset because their feelings are getting hurt. People are starting to realize they cant trust her and dont want to be her friend. This is causing everyone to kind of break apart. We have problems with cliques. What can we do to fix this?

Answer
Haley,

I admire you for wanting to do something to help. This girl needs to be sat down by the youth leaders and told whats up. If she is causing a rift then they should step in and take care of her. You could maybe get together some of the other youth and just tell her how you all feel. if she threatens to leave then maybe it would be ok. When someone is causing strife they may be a plant and not truly there to be a good witness for the Lord. There are to few people willing to tell these few trouble makers that they need to realize they are the problem and all they are doing is causing the group to split. A youth group is so much different then an adult group and needs to be handled differently. If your youth leaders do not see it then you may just need to ask them to speak to this girl. If they do not want to because of the girls parents standing in the church or they are just afraid she may leave then you should do something.