Expert: Brenda Martin - 6/5/2009

Question
I started going to church about 3-5 months ago,I got saved and I got serious,but there was only one problem,I got close to a friend and ended up liking her,around the middle of may(I'm bi)I told her I liked her,we had a talk with our youth leader,he said to keep a distance,I did.I feel like I'm not bi anymore(I've been praying,ready certain scriptures and staying accountable as my youth leader has asked of me),but then I'm not sure,I feel like I'm in a hamster wheel,I'm moving but going nowhere,This is really hendering me so much from my calling,I feel so close to my break thorough to get over this but I feel like I cant reach it,please help.

Answer
Hi Ashley, When I read your question it made me think of the scripture that says; "you will know the TRUTH & the truth will set you FREE" (John 8:31, 32)

so when folk are members of a religion that teaches falsehoods they are not being taught the "truth" so in consequence they are not "free"

If you were being taught the truth from God's word you would be better equipped to deal with stuff like this, you would know God, his purpose for the earth & his personality & armed with that vital knowledge you would be "free" to pursue the more important things in life.

It is possible to know the truth, even in these critical “last days” when falsehood and untruth abound. (2 Timothy 3:1)

The book "What Does the Bible Really Teach?" is designed to help people to examine the Bible’s clear answers to vital questions.

There is no greater treasure to be found. Bible truth liberates us from superstition, confusion, and morbid fear. It gives us hope, purpose, and joy. Jesus said: “You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”—John 8:32.

You can obtain a copy of this book (free of charge) from www.watchtower.org

In conclusion staying in a faith that teaches the non scriptural stand of "once saved always saved" will only hinder in your progress toward pleasing God.

for instance here is the bible based information our youths receive from their religion--

How Can I Avoid Homosexuality?

“During my teens I struggled with an attraction to other males. Deep down, I knew those thoughts weren’t normal.”—Olef.

“My girlfriend and I kissed once or twice. Since I still liked boys, I wondered if I might be bisexual.”—Sarah.

FEW would deny that homosexuality is talked about more openly today than it was several decades ago. And just try to say that you disapprove of it! Likely, you will be bombarded with criticism. Says 16-year-old Amy, “One girl told me that I must be prejudiced against people of other races, because my opinion of homosexuality amounted to the same thing—prejudice!”

Today’s permissive attitudes have prompted a number of youths to experiment with same-sex relationships. “Many girls in my school claim to be either lesbian, bisexual, or ‘bi-curious,’” says 15-year-old Becky. Christa, 18, finds the situation similar at her school. “Two classmates have actually propositioned me,” she says. “One wrote me a note asking if I wanted to see what it was like to be with a girl.”

With same-sex relationships being touted so openly, you may begin to wonder: ‘Is homosexuality really that bad? What if I’m attracted to someone of my sex? Does that mean I’m gay?’

How Does God View Homosexuality?

Today, many people—even some clergymen—soft-pedal the issue of homosexuality. Yet, God’s Word, the Bible, leaves no room for confusion. It tells us that Jehovah God made man and woman and that he purposed for sexual desires to be fulfilled only between a husband and a wife. (Genesis 1:27, 28; 2:24) It comes as no surprise, then, that the Bible condemns homosexual acts.—Romans 1:26, 27.

Some would say that God’s Word is out-of-date. But why, do you think, are they so quick to make that claim? Could it be because the Bible’s view conflicts with their own? Many reject God’s Word simply because it teaches something different from what they want to believe. That view is biased, though, and we should rise above such closed-minded thinking!

But what if you feel attracted to a member of the same sex? Does this automatically mean that you’re a homosexual? No. Remember, you’re in “the bloom of youth,” a period when you’re subject to involuntary sexual arousal. (1 Corinthians 7:36) If at times you feel an attraction to a member of the same sex, be assured that this doesn’t mean that you’re gay. Such inclinations usually fade with time. Meanwhile, you must keep from getting involved in homosexual practices. How?

Pray about the matter. Implore Jehovah as David did: “Search through me, O God, and know my heart. Examine me, and know my disquieting thoughts, and see whether there is in me any painful way, and lead me in the way of time indefinite.” (Psalm 139:23, 24) Jehovah can fortify you with a peace that “excels all thought.” This can ‘guard your heart and your mental powers’ and give you “power beyond what is normal” to keep from acting on wrong desires.—Philippians 4:6, 7; 2 Corinthians 4:7.

Fill your mind with upbuilding thoughts. (Philippians 4:8) Read the Bible daily. Never underestimate its power to shape your mind and heart for good. (Hebrews 4:12) A young man named Jason says: “The Bible—including such scriptures as 1 Corinthians 6:9, 10 and Ephesians 5:3—has had a powerful effect on me. I read these scriptures whenever wrong desires occur.”

Shun pornography and gay propaganda. (Colossians 3:5) Avoid anything that will arouse immoral desires. This would include pornography, certain TV shows and movies, and perhaps even fashion or bodybuilding magazines that feature lightly clad models. Change negative thoughts to positive ones. “Whenever I have homosexual urges,” says one teenage boy, “I meditate on my favorite Bible text.”
Of course, some claim that there’s no point in doing all this, that you should simply ‘embrace your sexuality’ and ‘accept who you are.’

But the Bible says that you can do better than that! It tells us, for example, that some early Christians who had formerly practiced homosexuality changed. (1 Corinthians 6:9-11) You too can win the battle—even if at this point it’s only being waged in your heart.
What if same-sex desires persist? Do not give in to them! Jehovah condemns homosexual acts. Thus, the person who struggles with same-sex desires is presented with a reachable goal—he or she can choose not to act on those desires.

To illustrate: A person might be “disposed to rage.” (Proverbs 29:22) In the past he may have freely given in to fits of anger. After studying the Bible, though, he becomes aware of the need to develop self-control. Does this mean that he’ll never again feel anger welling up inside him? No. However, because he knows what the Bible says about uncontrolled anger, he will strive hard not to succumb to his feelings.

It’s similar with a person who is attracted to others of the same sex but who has now come to learn what the Bible says about homosexual practices. On occasion, an improper desire may still present itself. But by viewing homosexuality the way Jehovah views it, a person can find the strength to resist that desire.

Don’t Give Up!

If you struggle with same-sex desires, you might feel as did one young man, who said: “I’ve tried to change my feelings. I’ve prayed to Jehovah for help. I read the Bible. I’ve heard talks on the subject. But I don’t know where to turn.”

If you’re in a similar situation, you clearly have a real fight on your hands. There’s no easy cure. Nevertheless, anyone who desires to please God must conform to His moral standards and shun immoral behavior, even though doing so may be agonizingly difficult. Never forget that God understands the struggle you have in your heart and that he has compassion for those who serve him. (1 John 3:19, 20) When you obey God’s commandments, you open the way for receiving his blessing. In fact, in the keeping of God’s commands, “there is a large reward.” (Psalm 19:11) Even now, you’ll enjoy the best way of life possible in this troubled world.

So rely on God, and fight against wrong desires. (Galatians 6:9) Strive to “abhor what is wicked” and “cling to what is good.” (Romans 12:9) With time and effort, you are likely to find that the wrong desires diminish. Best of all, by avoiding homosexual practices, you’ll have the prospect of living forever in God’s righteous new world."

this article is taken from a book entitled "Questions Young People Ask, Answers that Work" which can also be obtained from the website I mentioned earler.


all the best
Brenda