Expert: Brenda Martin - 8/11/2009

Question
Hi, I am a follower of Jesus Christ and I have a boyfriend who is also a Christian. but recently the subject of oral sex has crept up, i do love him and he loves me, we want to get married. I have prayed to God about him many times, God always answers my prayers. but the one question is...is it ok 4 us to have oral sex? because i don't want him to go and look for it somewhere else

Answer
Can a couple who refrain from sexual intercourse still be guilty of fornication?

Yes; The original Greek word translated “fornication” (por·nei′a) has a broad meaning. It describes all forms of sexual relations outside of marriage and focuses on the misuse of the sexual organs. Thus, fornication includes not only intercourse but also acts such as masturbating another person, as well as engaging in oral sex or anal sex.

Furthermore, the Bible condemns more than just fornication. The apostle Paul wrote: “The works of the flesh are manifest, and they are fornication, uncleanness, loose conduct.” He added: “Those who practice such things will not inherit God’s kingdom.”—Galatians 5:19-21.

What is “uncleanness”? The Greek word covers impurity of any kind, in speech or action. Surely it would be unclean to allow one’s hands to stray under another person’s clothing, to remove another’s clothing, or to caress another’s intimate areas, such as the breasts. In the Bible the caressing of the breasts is associated with the pleasures reserved for married couples.—Proverbs 5:18, 19.

Some youths brazenly defy godly standards. They deliberately go too far, or they greedily seek out numerous partners with whom they can practice sexual uncleanness. Such ones may be guilty of what the apostle Paul called “loose conduct.” The Greek word for “loose conduct” means ‘outrageous acts, excess, insolence, unbridled lust.’ Surely you want to avoid coming to be “past all moral sense” by giving yourself over to “loose conduct to work uncleanness of every sort with greediness.”—Ephesians 4:17-19.

all the best
Brenda