Expert: Brenda Martin - 8/14/2009

Question
hi, i can't rap my head around it. ok, i'm 14 i have thougts about guys all the time. and i masterbate but im trying to stop but its hard not caues isn't it a sin. i think i broke my (charry) the first time i used a tanpon. so does it still mean im a vergan? or do i need to be born agon? do i ask for forgiveness? caues i have no clue. so can you help? please and thank you.

Answer
Hi Jessica, you saiod--" i'm 14 i have thougts about guys all the time"

Ive yet to meet a girl of your age who doesnt, thats perfectly normal :¬) your at the age the bible calls- " the bloom of youth" (1 cor 7;36)However the Bible uses the phrase “bloom of youth” to describe the time of life when sexual feelings and romantic emotions become strong as a warning--To maintain close association with one particular member of the opposite sex while you are still in “the bloom of youth” can fan the flames of desire and cause you to learn the hard way the wisdom of Galatians 6:7: “Whatever a man is sowing, this he will also reap.”

"I masterbate but im trying to stop"

Often it is what one reads, watches, or listens to, as well as what one talks about or meditates on, that triggers masturbation. As one 25-year-old woman confessed: “I just couldn’t seem to stop the habit. However, I used to read romance novels, and this contributed to the problem.”

Many youths, though generally successful in overcoming this bad habit, occasionally give in to it. Fortunately, God is very merciful. “For you, O Jehovah, are good and ready to forgive,” said the psalmist. (Psalm 86:5) When a Christian succumbs to masturbation, his heart is often self-condemning. Yet, the Bible states that “God is greater than our hearts and knows all things.” (1 John 3:20) God sees more than our sins. The greatness of his knowledge enables him to hear with sympathy our earnest pleas for forgiveness. As one young woman wrote: “I have felt guilty to an extent, but knowing what a loving God Jehovah is and that he can read my heart and know all my efforts and intentions keeps me from feeling too depressed when I fail on occasion.” If you fight the desire to masturbate, it is not likely that you will commit the serious sin of fornication.

"i broke my (charry) the first time i used a tanpon. so does it still mean im a virgin?"

Youve not had sex,( I hope) so your still a virgin.

"do i need to be born agon?"

No.

"do i ask for forgiveness?"

For masturbating yes, but not for using a tampon :¬)

all the best
Brenda