Expert: Jaycie - 1/22/2010

Question
I am 14. There is a girl i go to school with in my seminary class(early morning) and we talk a lot. She has a non-member boyfriend and talks about him a lot. She has said that they fool around... Yet she gave a devotional and at the end she said, "The thing I want to do most in my life is do what I can to be able to see my grandfather again." She says this yet she knows that being with this guy is only bringing her further away from the temple. Do you think I should say anything to her?

Answer
Do you know for sure what she meant by fool aroound? I know a lot of people who just mean strictly kissing with that. And kissing won't keep you out of the Celestial Kingdom or even out of the temple. It's when you start doing other things. So before you do anything, I'd make sure you know what she meant.

She might just not know that what she does in this life affects what she can do in the next. A lot of non-members think that way because of the fact that everyone is going to live again. And she might be giving up her knowledge for him. So that could be confusing her a little bit so she's not thinking about what she's doing and the consequences that can come with it eternally. That could also be a reason that she's saying and doing different things.

I think the best thing for you to do first, just do neither of you feel awkward or anything, is talk to the teacher about having a lesson about this kind of thing. You don't have to tell him exactly what's going on or even who you're worried about but just tell him that you think there should be a lesson about what happens according to what we do in this life. You can explain the situation a little bit and just say that you've noticed that a lot of people aren't thinking about the eternal outcomes of their actions. You could say it better than I can because you know the situation a lot better. But just talk to him and tell him what you're worried about and that you think this is a good idea for everyone. Then after the lesson, go up to the girl and just ask what she thought about it and then leave it at that.

I don't like to say this but it is kind of up to her. But if you feel okay with it, talk to her about it and just find a way to explain that she has to be careful with what she does with her boyfriend to make sure she'll be okay in the future. She knows what she should do but I think she's being confused because of the boy. You could also bring that up to your teacher as well.