Expert: Pastor Don Carpenter - 5/28/2010

Question
QUESTION: Hello pastor Don I have a concern about masturbation. I masturbate from time to time and I know that our lord is the creator of sex and were not suppose to have sex until marrige. Pastor Don I do confess that I'm a virgin and will remain until marrige. Sometimes I feel these urges to masturbate and I always thought it was a healthy way to keep the body healthy and normal. I do look at images while I masturbate but its not porn. I do confess that I look at images of sexy women but there not nude. I thought that masturbation was ok because I thought it would help me remain virgin until marriage. is masturbating wrong when you are single? I do confess that I masturbate to relieve the sexuall tention and after I feel more in controll cause the sexual feelings are gone. I know where suppose to remain pure until marrige but am I using masturbation as an excuse or abusing my relationship with my future wife? I don't mean any harm and I do admit that one of my worst fears is to make our lord angry. I don't wanna abuse my future relationship with my future wife I masturbate cause I always thought it was ok and was helping me remain a virgin instead of having intercourse outside of marrige which is sin. Pastor Don I don't know what to do and I know that our lord is the creator of sex and he gave us sexual desires but I don't know how to handle them until marrige I do admit that I'm afriad to do anything because everything now in this world revovles around sex and lust I feel like I'm safe by just staying home so I don't commit sin. I confess I'm afraid and I feel because of this that I'm not going to heaven please help me pastor Don thank you and God bless

ANSWER: Hi Adrian,

Thanks for this great and heart felt question.  I have a few thoughts that should help you.

1.  If you have trusted Jesus Christ as your Savior, then all your sins have been forgiven, the ones you have committed, and the ones you have yet to commit.

2 Corinthians 5:21
21 For he hath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in him.

The King James Version, (Cambridge: Cambridge) 1769.

Therefore, masturbation as a sin, will not cost you heaven as long as you have already asked Jesus to Save you from your sins by faith.

2.  There is no verse in the Bible that specifically says that one is not to masturbate.  There are verses that are very clear that we are not to lust after women in our minds.

Matthew 5:27-29
27 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: 28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. 29 And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.  
The King James Version, (Cambridge: Cambridge) 1769.

3.  It seems that you already have a feeling that masturbation is wrong, and I tend to agree.  The Bible tells us that if you feel that something is unclean, than for you it is unclean.

Romans 14:14
14 I know, and am persuaded by the Lord Jesus, that there is nothing unclean of itself: but to him that esteemeth any thing to be unclean, to him it is unclean.  
The King James Version, (Cambridge: Cambridge) 1769.

4.  You battle is one of highs and lows.  Every day that you do not masturbate is a day of spiritual victory.  If you stumble, then ask forgiveness, and then get back up and start again.

Proverbs 24:16
16 For a just man falleth seven times, and riseth up again: but the wicked shall fall into mischief.

The King James Version, (Cambridge: Cambridge) 1769.

I hope that this helps you.

In Christ
Pastor Don

I hope that this helps you.

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Thank you for your help Pastor Don. I understood what you said. Masturbation is not clearly a sin but what makes it a sin is what goes along with it right? For example: you feel the urge to masturbate but the only thing that helps you masturbate is by looking at an image. Pastor Don I admit that if I feel the urge, I can't see myself masturbating without having to look at something but there not nude and I don't fantasize with them cause I know that fantaszing with them is wrong. Paston Don I'm not tring to back up the catagory I always thought it was a safe way to release secual feeling but now I feel bad since it has a part of my life. I do admit I'm confused since its not clearly said if its a sin in the bible but I don't know how to handle it till marrige. I feel like our lord is angry with me for always falling into the catagory. Pastor Don I'm a good person I don't swear I don't drink well I use to have a few but not any more I like to help others and I'm very understanding and friendly. What will happen if I don't masturbate? I heard I can get prostate cancer or higher risk or something if masturbation is appsence. Pastor Don I feel so terrible I do admit it does help me from looking after its happens. Since it helps me from not lusting what so I do? May I ask what do you think lust really means? I asked my mother and she said that "if you fantasize about that person and you picture yourself with them having sexuall relation then its serious lust" I don't know Pastor Don I admit I'm affraid and I thank you for your last response God bless

Answer
Thank you for this great follow up question.  Masturbation is not a physical requirement.  I am not aware of any evidence that one will get cancer if you do not do this.  In fact, the way I understand it, the body cares for this kind of release on its own through wet dreams etc.  I believe that the more you give in to this urge, the more that it will rule you, not the other way around.  Remember, Satan's temptation is for just one more sin, just one more step, just onemore time.... but every time you yield to lust, lust grows stronger and it will take more to satisfy you next time.

Joh 8:34  Jesus answered them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whosoever committeth sin is the servant of sin.

I hope that this helps you.

In Christ
Pastor Don