Expert: Carl Fuglein - 8/20/2010

Question
QUESTION: Hello Mr. Fluglien, we have spoken before. My
question was about my battle with purity and
finding the right guy and figuring out when was
the right time to tell him I am pure. Well I have
really been tring to live the purity life. But to
show my descion and belief I wanted to get a
tattoo on my heart saying true love waits. I
know tattoo's are wrong but it feels so right it's
something that I want to do! but my parents
are of course against the thought of it. What
should I do? I want it really bad I want to show
people that I mean what I say, I mean I
understand that this is going to be permanent
but so is the choice of being pure.

Thank you once again
Javine

ANSWER: Hi Javine,

nice to hear from you.  I LOVE your idea, but unfortunately, if you're under 18, you have to respect your parents and abide by what they say.  I don't think tatoos are wrong - it's when they become an obsession and get them all over your body that I think it becomes sinful.

If you put your tattoo on your heart, how will anyone see it?  You'd have to wear a bikini - and if you're trying to remain pure, I don't think you should be wearing a bikini.  Just a thought.  Why not tattoo a heart on your forearm so more people can see it , but you have to wait until you're 18.

Hope this helps.

Carl


---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Thank you Mr.Carl but LOL I'm going to be turning 18 on august 18th that's
when I'm getting the tattoo LOL. But your right I might get it somewere were
people will see it. Don't worry I won't become over obsessive. This is just
something to show people what I am, who I represent which is Jesus, and
what is in my heart. Thank you for the advice!!!! But what do I tell my parents
if they do find out?

ANSWER: Well, if you don't hide the tattoo, they will see it.  I suggest you come home immediately and say to them - I'm 18, and this is my choice.  I'm sorry you don't approve, but it can't be removed.  I believe that this tattoo will help me remain pure - it's just another way to say to God that I will live a pure life.

Good luck, because they're gonna be pissed.  I don't know your parents, but I've heard of some people getting kiced out of the house for that.

Let me know what you decide, and what happens with your parents.

blessings,
carl


---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Well mr. Carl I got the tattoo. It says true love waits like I told you. After he
finished all I could think about was what my patens were gonna say I didn't
want to hide it from them because if they found out on there own then they
would be even more mad. I told my mom and she flipped out she said I
disobeyed them and I went behind her back. She said that they will never
trust me again and that really hurt. I've always been the good child making
good grades and doing what's right. I never ment to dissapoint her or my
father when he finds out. She wouldn't listen to me she told me to get out of
her face and leave her alone. she wouldn't let me explain the descision and
the purpose on why I got the tattoo or how much it ment to me. I'm scared of
my dad he is alot worse then my mom. I just don't know what to do now

Answer
Javine-

I'm proud of you for doing what YOU wanted and needed to do to honor God.  It will also be a testament to your committment to remain pure.

I'm terribly sorry your mom reacted the way she did, but as I warned you, she was going to be pissed.  All you can do is live one day at a time and eventually she will get over it and understand.  Try to talk to her, and when you do, remain calm - don't you be the one starting the yelling.

Good luck with your dad.

blessings,
carl