Expert: Carl Fuglein - 8/31/2005

Question
Hello.  My wife and I were put in charge of the youth this weekend at a camp retreat.  We're expecting about 15-20 youth.  One of the activities that is in the program is a campfire.  Do you have any ideas of any fun activities we can do with them or any topics to discuss?  Your imput is appreciated.  Thanks.

Answer
Graig-

Thanks so much for spending time with youth - it's one of the most rewarding things that I've done in my life.  You will be blessed.

Not knowing what the rest of your program is, it's hard to say what to do at the campfire.  Campfires should be serious, and if you have a specific program that you're following, the campfire should in some way recap or summarize some of the things that you've talked about during the day, and ask for some sort of response.  Let me give you an example - if you've been talking about priorities to better honor God?  

If you don't have a specific theme for the whole retreat, and since I'm personally and emotionally attached to the victims of Hurricane Katrina, I would suggest that you may want to talk about that.  (My daughter and son-in-law live in Slidell, about the hardest hit city other than New Orleans.  They are both safe, but their house flooded.) A natural disaster such as this opens up a whole lot of questions - here's some examples:

Where was God in the midst of all this?
Do you blame God for what happened?  Why, why not?
How do you think God is going to respond in this situation?
Do you think your prayers concerning this disaster will be answered?
What will YOU do about this situation? (possible answers are raise money, volunter to go on a mission trip there, give up your allowance to send to the Red Cross, etc, etc, etc.  Be very silent, and don't give them any answers - let them think about it.
What do you think you would do if you suddenly found yourself homeless due to a situation like this?
If you lived in the area and were told to evacuate, would you?  Or would stay and ride it out?
If you evacuated, and had enough time to pack the back of a minivan, what would you take with you?  If you could take only what you could carry, what would you take with you?  (This question is really quite serious - people like myself who have lived in and evacuated in the face of a hurricane know that the most important things to take are photos and irreplaceable keepsakes.  Most other people will answer their TV, their Gameboys, their clothes, etc.  I actually saw someone once on TV running from a flood and he had a TV in his boat.  I wondered where he was going to plug it in?)
You could ask questions about ethics - what do they think about the looters?  Is it okay to steal TV's & jewelry?  probably no.  How about food and water?  probably yes.  But then you can get into a gray area - how about clothes? or a teddy bear for your child?

Hope this gives you some ideas.  I have one left, to do last.  It's called Candle Confirmation. Get in a circle and stand around the campfire so everyone could see everyone else. Take a large candle with you and light it.  You start it off by choosing someone on the retreat (as a leader, you should choose a loner or someone who might not otherwise be chosen).  Choose this one person, say something without actually naming them, say something like "This person is very giving and always puts others before himself." or anything that is positive encouragement about them.  Then, slowly walk over to that person and hand them the candle, then instruct them to do the same for someone else until everyone in the circle has been chosen, and that person should say something nice about you.  A person should not be picked twice.  This sometimes can be an amazing time and you will sometimes hear things that you least expect - I once got chosen by one kid who was always a loner, one who is socially challenged, but brilliant - many of us think he is slightly autistic, and I thought that I was NEVER reaching him about anything; yet he still picked me as being encouraging to him.  You can do this about once every two years or so to keep it special.  After it's over, tell them that they don't have to wait to tell someone nice things - that they should look for positive behavior all the time and tell people about it.

At the very end, depending on the number of adults you have, you can station each adult in a different quiet place to be available for counseling.  Sometimes kids will take you up on and sometimes not, but we always try to do that.  Real ministry happens one on one (despite all the politically correct stuff that's been going on the last few years about not being alone with a child).  Ask them to go back to their cabin or rooms in silence, and then only whispers once they get back (otherwise they will stay up all night and talk).

Hope this helps.  Please, please, please, write back and tell me how it went and what you did.  It's how I get to be a better youth minister and advisor when I hear what worked and what didn't.

Thanks again for volunteering your time.  Please take a minute or so and rate my answer.  Thanks.

blessings,
carl