Expert: Dr Tim Gladu - 3/23/2007

Question
I have a friend that is a Christian, and she is really swaying from the right
path.  She is considering having sex with her boyfriend, whose not a
Christian, not to mention, she only 14.  She seems to think that the only way
to happiness is sex, and i have tried to tell her differently.  Everything i say
goes in one ear, and out the other.  I don't want to make her mad at me by
telling her what i feel, but i also don't want to let her get hurt.  I want her to
know that i will be her friend thought it all, but i don't agree with what she is
thinking.  What should i tell her?    Thank you.

Answer
Shanna,

You are right to continue to stop you friend from doing what she knows is wrong. I have to turn to the Bible for help in these questions and let God answer this question for you. I am going to give you a list of scripture to look at and it should help you in your effort to stop this horrible mistake.

The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. (1 Corinthians 6:13)

Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. (1 Corinthians 6:18)

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body. (1 Corinthians 6:19-20)

We should not commit sexual immorality. (1 Corinthians 10:8)

For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. (1 Thessalonians 4:7)

You are to abstain from ... sexual immorality. (Acts 15:29)

Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. (Colossians 3:5)

But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars - their place will be in the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death. (Revelation 21:8)

For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person - such a man is an idolater - has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. (Ephesians 5:5)

But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people. (Ephesians 5:3)

The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. (Galatians 5:19-21)

I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God. (Galatians 5:21)

This is just a small sampling of what you will need to battle this desire in your friend. Tell her that if this boy truly loves her then he would want her to stay pure until marriage so she can give her husband this precious gift that can only be given once then it is lost. God meant from the beginning that man and women would have sex, but it has always been meant for marriage. I commend your efforts in this and I hope that you have an adult that you both can go to and discuss these issues with. I would hope that if you are in a youth group or even a Sunday school class there is a women that could at least be there to help you both with this very tough issue. I know that the desire to have sex is great, but with the help of God and good friends like you they can be beaten.

God bless