Expert: Brenda Martin - 12/11/2005

Question
hi,Brenda
 im 14 years old and i've been raised in the church all my life but now that i older im not really feeling the whole religon thing but i'm still made to go and im i having a hard time dealing with this. i really want to be under god's  will and submit unto him because i know who he is but im  still really not feeling it. i know that god is wonderful and great and i know i need him. and my mother always tell me that i will always have to come back to god forthing and i know. so can u tell me what maybe i can do to get him down in my spirit so that i can love and worship him ?

thank a lot
jasmine  

Answer
Hi Jasmine, you said-- “IM 14 YEARS OLD AND I'VE BEEN RAISED IN THE CHURCH ALL MY LIFE BUT NOW THAT I OLDER IM NOT REALLY FEELING THE WHOLE RELIGON THING”

This is quite common, as we reach the teenage years we begin to question things more, when we are younger we are happy to be taken along to the religion our parents choose. I was forever getting told off for asking what about this and what about that? I saw hypocrisy in the church (Protestant) and I used to say this to my mum, all I got was a clip round the ear and told not to be cheeky.

But I kept on questioning this and that and finally after studying the bible myself I left (age 16) but I didn't leave God, quite the opposite, I found a religion that answered all my questions and really applied what the bible says.

So sometimes it is not a matter of wanting to leave God, it is just that we begin to feel empty in the religion we are a part of, so maybe you can give that some thought. Not all religions are pleasing to God after all, perhaps you need to find that the one that is serving God correctly.

“BUT I'M STILL MADE TO GO AND IM I HAVING A HARD TIME DEALING WITH THIS.”

Yes that must be difficult, but it shows what a nice daughter you are to still go along with your parents meantime, you will not always be 14 and the day will come (if you still feel the same) to go elsewhere for spiritual giudance.

“I REALLY WANT TO BE UNDER GOD'S WILL AND SUBMIT UNTO HIM BECAUSE I KNOW WHO HE IS.”

Excellent, well then I see your problem isnt that you want to leave God, it is just “religion” is putting you off. I was the same at your age, I loved God and wanted to please him, but the religion I was attending didn't fill my needs, I didnt see” love of God” in the people who attended.

Also the way I felt about God and the way I imagined him to be, didn't come over from the Minister who taught basically “if your good you will go to heaven and if your bad you will go to hell” I used to ask myself “why would a loving God torture people forever in some fiery furnace?” that didn't make sense to me.

I got my opportunity when I turned 19, to ask the Minster; ” where it says that in the bible?” and he answered “it doesn't” so I asked him “why he taught that at his church” and he replied; “it's a job, its what I'm told to teach” I was really angry that I had spent all those years in his church listening to a load of lies.

My parting words to him were, “I have learnt more about the bible in these last 3 months, than in all the years attending your church”

So you see, a religion needs to be teaching Gods word and living by God's word, or its empty and it will not keep its flock.

For instance you said; “ I want to be under God's will” which is lovely, but I wonder if you really know what God's will is ,because I know I was not taught it in church. I thought I knew God's will but all I knew was what I was being taught by some man, interesting isn't it. We can only know God's will if we study his word the bible. (John 17;3)

Also you said you “know who God is” well did you know for instance God is only a title, like sir or madam, God has a personal name just like you and I, are you taught that in your church, because if your not, no wonder your not “feeling it”

“I KNOW THAT GOD IS WONDERFUL AND GREAT AND I KNOW I NEED HIM.”

Yes well said, he certainly is, and there is no doubt we all need him, so don't throw away God because of how a religion is portraying him. I would hazard a guess and say, you're just not “feeling the whole religion thing” because the religion you attend is not teaching its listeners what they need to know.

For instance are you taught these things from God's word?—

Why do we grow old and die?
Why does God permit suffering?
Whose worship does God accept?
Why we are here.
What you must do to live forever.

And some that may interest you as a teenager—

Why don't my parents understand me?
How can I say no to premarital sex?
Why say no to drugs
What does the future hold for me?

All these questions and many more are answered in God's word, now don't you think you would be “feeling it” if the speaker was talking about such subjects? I'm sure you would.

“WHAT CAN I DO TO GET HIM DOWN IN MY SPIRIT SO THAT I CAN LOVE AND WORSHIP HIM?”

If what our parents have taught us is really from the Bible, we should hold on to it. Even if we learn that their religious practices and beliefs are out of harmony with God's Word, our parents deserve our respect.

However we must make a decision: Do we really love God? Do we really want to obey God's Son? Our doing so may require that we leave the religion of our parents to take up true worship. It certainly would not be fitting to allow our devotion to our parents to be greater than our love for God and Christ, would it? Jesus said: “He that has greater affection for father or mother than for me is not worthy of me; and he that has greater affection for son or daughter than for me is not worthy of me.”—Matt. 10:37.

If you really want to “love and worship God” then it is important for you, first of all to, find out if the religion you're a member of is one that is “worshipping God” in the way God says. How can you do this? By studying the bible.

I will be happy to discuss any questions you have and together we can find out if your religion is pleasing God, because there's no point in you trying to “love and worship God” in a religion that is not pleasing to him, is there?

So that would be my first suggestion see what you think, write to me here and together we will examine the bibles teachings, then you can look at the teachings of the bible and see if they match with the teachings of your church.

I look forward to hearing from you.

All the best
Brenda