Expert: Joe Norman - 3/2/2011

Question
I'm inclined to believe as you that divorce is a forgivable sin. Furthermore, I'm inclined to believe that without any example or passage indicating a divorced person must leave one marriage and return to another we shouldn't be teaching such. Another thing that makes me wonder is if God knew the Jews couldn't live under this yoke, why would He pronounce such unwavering punishment upon Christians who live with the same frailties and imperfections? It is good to teach against divorce but once it occurs we are making a leap to convince people they are in a "perpetual state" of anything.

I understand your argument on this passage. However, I'm curious as to your understanding on verse 11 where she is to "remain unmarried." If she was not considered divorced how could she remain unmarried. I've looked at several translations and they all have used the term "unmarried." This is the only passage I see that gives credence to the notion of a person having to remain unmarried. Of course, it doesn't deal with what should happen if she does not and repents of her sin. And I would agree that I can see no justification, no scripture, to support another divorce as a just end for her repentance.

Answer
I appreciate your asking me your question and it's good to see someone who can understand and identify the many problems with what is traditionally taught on divorce and remarriage. I am more than happy to share my understanding of I Cor.7:10,11 and hope that it is beneficial to you.

1 Cor.7:10,11 (ASV#
10 But unto the married I give charge, yea not I, but the Lord, That the wife depart not from her husband 11 #but should she depart, let her remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband); and that the husband leave not his wife.

People sometimes get so caught up in Greek or a specific word that they confuse themselves or they end up twisting the true meaning of a passage. Paul spoke of this as well. There are several things that indicate Paul is not speaking of divorce in verses 10 and 11. First, Paul begins by addressing "the married" and not "the divorced". Also the most literal word for divorce is "apostasion" and that isn't used here. Then there is the fact that only the man could file for divorce. Also, if the couple is "divorced" they can't reconcile. They can only get married again. The only way to reconcile is if they are not divorced and only separated.

Now regarding the word "unmarried" which is agamos in the original language. It literally means not in a marriage. It doesn't mean divorced. If a woman leaves her husband (abandons) she no longer has a marriage even though there was no divorce. She is alone and living as a woman "not in a marriage". I am convinced this is what Paul means when he says "remain unmarried" because she was not able to divorce when this was written and because Paul says to remain unmarried "or be reconciled to your husband". Divorce always ends a marriage and had there been one he wouldn't be called her husband but her ex-husband.

Then when we read verses 26-28 Paul speaks of those bound to a wife and those loosed from a wife.

1 Cor.7:26-28
26 I suppose therefore that this is good because of the present distress—that it is good for a man to remain as he is: 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But even if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. Nevertheless such will have trouble in the flesh, but I would spare you.

Paul clearly says that if a man is "loosed" (which clearly means he was once bound or married) from a wife not to see a wife but even if he does marry he doesn't sin by the marriage. This completely destroys the "traditional" teaching on divorce and remarriage...at least that's my opinion. If you have further questions please let me know. I hope I have been helpful to you.

In closing I want to clarify that I hate divorce as well. I believe marriage should be once and for life. But I also believe sometimes divorce will happen. It only takes one person in the marriage to cause it to end. Sometimes it's because one or both are hard-hearted and desire to sin by adultery or divorcing without reason. Sometimes it is because one chooses to physically abuse the other. As I see it divorce is only a sin if it is done without a serious cause. But that sin is still forgivable. Covenant breaking can be forgiven. How does a person repent of covenant breaking? By vowing not to do it again. Making the next marriage for life.

I don't wish to see any marriage end but that marriage should be one that honors God. My mom told me no problem can come in a marriage that two Christians can't work through. I believe that is true. The problem can only be too great when one or both choose to stop living life by Christian standards.

In Christian Love, Joe Norman