Churches Of Christ/remarriage


My name is Sherhea Goff and I have a question about marraige. My boyfriend and I currently live together and have a 1 year old son. The problem is he is divorced and i read in your topics on marriage that the only way Jesus allows divorce is adultery. His first wife commited adultry on him and left the marriage for another man and asked my boyfriend to leave the home so she could be with the other man. My boyfriend wants to marry me but is concerned that he does not have the right to remarry because him and i had sexual relations before his divorce was finalized in court. The marrige covenant was already broken and bith him and his exwife agreed the marriage was over. The only thing lacking was the signitures on the paperwork. Since then we have asked for forgiveness and I have become a member of the church of Christ and been baptized. I want to be holy and beautiful in the sight of God and have a home for my son.Hope to hear from you soon.

Hello Sherhea,

Thank you for your question and the opportunity to answer it.

I will do my best to answer your question from God's Holy word as I understand it.

I am glad to hear you are seeking an answer from God's word to apply to your life and desiring to do God's will in your life.  I also rejoice that you made the decision to be baptized and be added to the Lord's church. (Acts 2:47)

This is a sad situation for your boyfriend.  A damaged relationship and divorce is never good.  And to compound the situation, your boyfriend's wife kicked him out of his own home so she could move her new boyfriend in with her.  This is a very sad and difficult situation for your boyfriend.

Based upon the situation you present, I believe your boyfriend has the right, according to the scriptures, to remarry.  His wife committed adultery, so according to Matthew 19:9, I believe he is free to divorce her and remarry. (Matthew 19:9: I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.) His wife committed sexual immorality, so the exception to the prohibition against remarriage applies.

I believe you and your boyfriend have the right to marry, despite you and he had sexual relations before his divorce was granted.  The sexual relations you and your boyfriend had would be sinful, but fortunately, sin can be forgiven.  The Bible tells us that as Christians we can repent and pray for forgiveness, and our sins will be forgiven.  God not only forgives us our sins, but he remembers them no more.  This is a beautiful benefit of being a Christian.

I am glad you want to be hold and beautiful in the sight of God and are seeking his will.  I don't know if you and your boyfriend are still having sexual relations or not, but if you are, that would be fornication, which the Bible says is a sin.  I would encourage you to cease any sexual relations with him until the two of you are married.

I wish you well with your marriage.  Please enjoy the piece of mind that, as I understand the scriptures, you and your boyfriend have the right to marry according to God's word, despite what you and your boyfriend did prior to his divorce being final.  Remember that whatever sin we commit, and we all commit sin, as Christians we can repent and pray for forgiveness, and rest assured that God will forgive and forget.

God Bless both of you.


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David W Cofer


I have been a member of the church of Christ since I was baptized as a teenager. I am a faithful member who attends worship service on a regular basis. I teach a Sunday school class, present devotionals, as well as perform other duties in our congregation. I can answer questions regarding what the church of Christ believes and practices, and what God's word says regarding various topics. My answers are never my personal opinion, but are backed up and based upon what the Bible says regarding the subject. I welcome your questions and the opportunity to provide an answer based upon God's word.


I have been a member of the church since I was baptized as a teenager. As a faithful member and teacher in the church, I draw upon a lifetime of experience in the church.

Free Bible correspondence course: email me at

B.A., University of Texas, Arlington. My degree is in Psychology.

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