Churches Of Christ/Divorce
I find myself in a situation that is heartbreaking. I am a Christian. I believe what the Bible teaches regarding marriage, divorce, and remarriage. My husband has moved out of our home. He is currently living with another woman. He professes that they are "roommates" and that they are not in a relationship. I feel that he is being dishonest, BUT, I have no proof that he IS, in fact, sexually involved with this woman. I do not want to divorce. I would like to save this marriage. However, he is not a Christian. He does not share the same beliefs regarding MDR. In our state, he could file for a "no fault" divorce, and I could refuse this based upon my beliefs. However, in our state, my refusal, in and of itself, is considered "irreconcilable differences" and a judge will grant him the divorce. Without 100% proof or an admission from him, how can I proceed with a divorce? I am young enough to know that I do not want to be alone forever, and I am sure, that in time, my heart would heal, and I would want to move on. My question is this: IF he forces me into a divorce without my having 100% proof of adultery, where does that leave me, as a Christian? Legally, we would be divorced, but, in the eyes of God, wouldn't we still be married? If I remained faithful to my vows even after a "legal" divorce, but he eventually became openly involved with this woman or another woman, would I ever be free to remarry?
Anna, I am sorry to hear about your problems. And I agree it is heartbreaking. I too have been through divorce and know the terrible effects of a broken marriage and children who suffer and are also heartbroken. Some people say death is maybe comparable, but I think not, un;less it is a child. But to answer your question, and if I answered your question in the way I believe you have been taught about MDR. Then I would say, you have no right to marriage. And I believe you understand this is true the way MDR teachers teach this topic. What they say is that YOU must be the one who files for divorce and cannot allow your husband to file the divorce first. They say Jesus taught that the one who does the divorce and the reason must be because of adultery then and only then can that person marry again and the other person is condemned to a life of celibacy.
Here I want to give you an article that bro. Waters wrote, after you read this go to website, "totalhealth dot bz" look on the left side of the home page and you will see, "Marriage and Divorce" click on this link and it will open to a lot of studies on the marriage doctrine. Read a few of this and study this with Bible in hand. Afterwards I believe your eyes will be open and you will begin to understand what Jesus was telling the Pharisees when they tried to trick Him. After you begin to understand what the Bible says about the Christian relationship and divorce you will be better to judge how you will handle your life. But let me say that God will never condemn you to a life of celibacy the way many teach in the church. Jesus said seek the truth and you will find it and be made free. Don't be a slave to the false doctrine of MDR. After you read some of these articles write me back and let me know if you have any other question. I could go through it all here but it is already written at the website I gave to you. And after you read at that site take a look at "Divorce and Remarriage Cults" there are some articles at the top right of this blog.