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Communication Skills/How do i end friendship with this friend?


He used to be a really nice dude in school. We were friends since 3-4 years. Then in the last year he changed and evolved into a sarcastic, mean person. We both used to hang out with the same group of people. School got over 6 months back and we went to our own seperate paths. Ivtalked to him a few times on skype and kik thinking that he might have changed in college. But he didnt. Everytime i talked to him, he said something mean.. That hurted my feelings. But i never reacted. I am thinking to meet everyone next week. He would probably be with us too. But i dont want to see his face no more. I think its time for me to pull the plug. I searched a lot on how to end friendship but only thing everyone suggested was that delete his number, delete him on every social networking sites etc. But i cant. I cant do it cuz itsnot possible for me to not to see his face again, because we have a lot of mutual friends. This is the only thing thats stopping me from ending this. I cant fight with him and create a fuss. I kust want to put a full stop and dont even wanna say buy to him.

Hello Moi - you have another choice besides cutting him off. Learn to practice respectful assertion and empathic listening :  and In the first of these, look for "I-messages." Also, see these examples for ideas: Try these and see what happens. - Pete

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Peter Gerlach, MSW


I can answer questions about how to significantly improve your thinking and communication effectiveness, and your relations with adults and kids. I cannot answer legal, medical, grammar, punctuation, spelling, or spiritual questions.


I have studied and taught communication and relationship skills for 40 years, and have been a professional family-systems therapist (MSW) since 1981.


I am a past Board member of (a) a large suburban community mental-health center and (b) the Stepfamily Association of America, and I am a current member of the National Stepfamily Resource Center (NSRC) Experts Council

I have published 6 books, including one on communication skills: Satisfactions ( 2nd ed., 2010); and over 150 articles in the nonprofit educational Website Break the Cycle! -

I have also published articles for and over 150 educational YouTube videos.

BSME, Stanford University, 1959 MSW, George Williams College 1981 Clinical internship U. of Illinois Institute for Juvenile Reasearch (IJR) 1981 Over 100 post-grad courses on a wide range of human-relationship topics

Past/Present Clients
over 1,000 self-referred Midwestern-U.S. adults, kids, couples, and families

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