Communication Skills/Abusive parents


I'm 21 years old girl i had arguments with my parents mostly harmles but they start to get voilent and start hiting me. Last night they both hited me crazily and my head is still throbing from pain beacause they said you will not sleep in seprate room because they dont trust me (i dont kow over what) i argued and said i will not and they startred hiting me. What should i do should i leave house? or seek police?

Family violence usually indicates that (1) the adults have inherited psychological wounds, and (2) don't know how to do win-win problem-solving.  -  (Option - show these articles to your parents).  -

Here are some ideas for relating to wounded people:

You may have inherited psychological wounds form your parents. If so, here's a way to heal them over time:

Be cautious about using the word "abuse":

I encourage you to be clear on your rights as a dignified person:  Your rights are the basis for asserting boundaries respectfully with your parents:

If you fear being injured, call the police. Consider asking your parents to seek family counseling for you all.

If you have questions about these ideas, please ask! Compassionately, Pete

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Peter Gerlach, MSW


I can answer questions about how to significantly improve your thinking and communication effectiveness, and your relations with adults and kids. I cannot answer legal, medical, grammar, punctuation, spelling, or spiritual questions.


I have studied and taught communication and relationship skills for 40 years, and have been a professional family-systems therapist (MSW) since 1981.


I am a past Board member of (a) a large suburban community mental-health center and (b) the Stepfamily Association of America, and I am a current member of the National Stepfamily Resource Center (NSRC) Experts Council

I have published 6 books, including one on communication skills: Satisfactions ( 2nd ed., 2010); and over 150 articles in the nonprofit educational Website Break the Cycle! -

I have also published articles for and over 150 educational YouTube videos.

BSME, Stanford University, 1959 MSW, George Williams College 1981 Clinical internship U. of Illinois Institute for Juvenile Reasearch (IJR) 1981 Over 100 post-grad courses on a wide range of human-relationship topics

Past/Present Clients
over 1,000 self-referred Midwestern-U.S. adults, kids, couples, and families

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