AboutRabbi Barry Dov Lerner Expertise Write to me with questions about Jewish customs and law, history,
philosophy and tradition for answers from a Conservative perspective or conversion. I am a graduate of The Jewish Theological Seminary and a member of the Conservative Rabbinical Assembly. Having served in congregational pulpits since 1970, I now am President of the Foundation For Family Education, Inc. a non-profit educational endeavor. I established it to create new formats of hands-on programs and provide free educational downloads at www.jewishfreeware.org. In addition to general informational questions I welcome your questions about programs for social action, outreach to dual-faith families, inter-faith clergy projects, healing services, education for conversion, adult education for the congregation and the community. If you have questions about Informal and Formal Education I am ready to share my extensive experience with Youth Activities, Camping and Religious School/Hebrew High School on a congregational, community and national/international level.
Experience I have served on the National Youth Commission for more than 25 years and serve on the Boards of the Conservative Zionist movement MERCAZ and the World Council of Synagogues. I have always dual-families and taught candidates for conversion with a great sense of fulfillment. I am very proud of 25 years on the Jewish camping staff of Camps Ramah. My greatest source of pride is my family! Ask me about them, please!:-)
My question is brief. I am just genuinely curious about something during the Amidah. At my BBYO convention this weekend I noticed that my friend, who does not believe in G*d, remained standing until the last person finished praying and sat down. Why did she do this? Is it a sign of respect?
Thanks!
Lindsey
Answer Dear Lindsey,
Thanks for writing, and I am responding as a former chapter, divisional, regional leader in AZA - many years ago.
Keep up the good work of being part of a youth program!!
Your friend, probably because of age, may or may not truly believe in God - that is a complicated theological conclusion and one that most of us grow into and with.
Your friend, however, is a lovely person. She observed a custom that I personally encourage as well, to wait standing until everyone has had a reasonable amount of time to recite the Amidah. Otherwise, people are rushed when they see people starting to sit down.
For that reason I also have begun the custom of having everyone conclude, while standing, of singing Oseh Shalom and then remain standing while we recite the Reader's Kaddish. Thus, more people have the opportunity to complete the Amidah without unnecessary pressure.
It is a very respectful sign on her part to care about the religious observance of others, and you are lucky she is your friend - and she is fortunate that you are her friend by virtue of this lovely question.
