Expert: Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner - 6/20/2006

Question
Thank you for your prompt response. You seem very sensible and I would like to follow up with one last question. Could you please explain to me your ideas on 1) our free will 2) Gods role in our free will and 3) how your ideas on 1 and 2 affect your prayer life.
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Followup To

Question -
I recently read Rabbi Kushner's book When Bad Things Happen to Good People. I understand his logic on free will and how prayer shouldn't be about asking for things like God is Santa. He mentions that he prays for patience, wisdom, and
understanding before he counsels his patients. My question is how can you distinguish from the two types of prayers? Aren't you still asking for something whether it is pious or selfish? If Kushner is not "asking" but praying that he
will be patient and understanding then doesn't prayer become meditation? In a practical application of this philosophy I cannot pray for God to heal my father if he is sick but pray for him and others to find strength, faith, etc during this time of need. But again...we are still asking for something that may not be given to us under his idea of God's role in our free will.


Answer -
Dear Nicholas,

Thanks for writing.

While you have identified that in both situations one is praying "for" nonetheless there is a difference.

In praying for healing, wealth, etc., one is asking for the gift of a material benefit. It is a relationship between a human being and a God who - in Kushner's terms - is a cosmic bellhop, delivering the bounty. The consequences of prayer come from without, from an external source.

In praying for understanding, for resolve, for personal strength to deal with the situation, one is really coming in touch with onesself. We are preparing ourselves to deal with the future, whatever it may bring.

It does turn out that a good mental attitude seems to have a significant effect on the results, such as in healing. The consequences of prayer  come from within, according to Kushner.

Best wishes

Rabbi Dov

Answer
Dear Nicholas,

Thanks for the compliments.

As a Jew I believe that we have free will, without limits. We have the capacity even to self-destruct as individuals or even as a world.

We have been created with this free will to any extent that God has participated in creating our fundamental nature and the rules of the world. I may not know how or understand the exact process, but this is my beief.

Therefore, for me prayer is a meditative process in which I focus on the talents and skills I have, the opportunities in which to use them to make this a better world for all humanity - in single acts and in participating with others as a society.

Best wishes

Rabbi Dov