Coping with Loss/Coping with loss

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Question
Hello, my name is wendy, i was born on 13/05/1976, i lost my gran in january this year an in september just gone i lost my son, my first born at 20yrs old, how am i suppose to accept this, will i ever ?

Answer
Dear Wendy,

I JUST got your question! I'm so sorry for the delay in response.

I am deeply sorry for your losses. Two major losses in the same year compounds and complicates the grieving process so please be very patient and gentle with yourself. Your losses were so recent that you are probably still experiencing feelings of being stunned and shocked. I lost my brother and my baby daughter in the same year. The loss of my daughter caused me to delay my grief for my brother. I didn't even begin to process my grief for my brother until one full year later!

I'm not sure there is an answer to the question, "How am I supposed to accept this, will I ever?" The process doesn't work that way. All you can do is integrate your experience of loss into your life and allow yourself to grieve for as long as you need to. As you let yourself feel all the feeling that come up, you will begin to heal. As you heal, you will "become" a new version of you. A deeper more compassionate Wendy because you have experienced loss.

I would recommend that you write letters in a journal to your gran and to your son. Tell them everything you never said and everything you want to say. When a loved one dies it is the end of their physical life, not the end of the relationship!

Take good care of you!

Gabrielle

Coping with Loss

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Rev. Gabrielle Michel

Expertise

As a grief expert and spiritual grief counselor, I can answer any questions about loss and the grieving process. I specialize in the loss of an infant up to the age of one year (miscarriage, PROM, abortion, stillbirth, SIDS, premature birth and any other type of infant loss).I can also answer any questions about faith and grief, especially for those dealing with anger with God.

Experience

Gabrielle Michel, a pioneer in the grief movement, is an interfaith minister, ordained in 2000, and spiritual counselor whose specialty is helping people work through grief and spiritual crisis. In 2004, she experienced a spiritual crisis of her own. February brought the miscarriage of her first baby; July, the death of her younger brother. In October, she said goodbye to a dear friend who succumbed to emphysema. And on December 22nd, she joyfully welcomed her second baby into the world, only to say goodbye to her the very next morning when death claimed her as well. Seeking solace in the midst of great spiritual pain, Gabrielle embarked on a quest to find comfort. Alone, she stumbled around in the dark trying to find her way back to faith, eventually becoming a Grief Recovery Specialist. Gabrielle researched over 50 books about grief and infant loss, and while they each had a little something to offer, none of them addressed the deep spiritual wound she had after losing her daughter. She found that the books on the market were memoir, psychology-based or religious. In her extensive research, Gabrielle discovered the critical missing pieces of our culture’s current grief paradigms. First, each book primarily focuses on the loss, and second, the books lack the applicable spiritual components needed for grievers to find hope. Her studies, training, and ministerial and spiritual counseling experience, along with her own recovery from deep despair, make Gabrielle a compelling, relatable writer and speaker on the topic of grief. Though the subject is dark and painful, her resilient spirit, disarming sense of humor and accessible demeanor allow her to produce articles, books, workshops and lectures that engage, inspire and empower.

Organizations
Graceful Grieving - Founder National League of Medical Hypnotherapists - Founding Member American Board of Hypnotherapy

Publications
Gifts of Gab at http://giftsofgab.blogspot.com http://www.ezinearticles.com Contributing writer for http://www.opentohope.com

Education/Credentials
Ordained Inter-faith Minister Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist Bachelor of Arts in Religious, Spiritual & Holistic Studies Certified Grief Recovery Specialist

Past/Present Clients
Maintain strict rules of confidentiality

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