Coping with Loss/death of fiance

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Natali wrote at 2012-05-03 18:40:39
I also lost my fiance 4 weeks ago in a motorbike accident and a few nights before he passed on I did get up and see him on the couch up with his eyes wide open, I never saw him like that before and I believe he probably had a premonition too.  Surprisingly I dreamt his death late last year the exact way it happened and when my mother came to give me the news I already knew what she was coming to tell me...strange huh.  When I had the dream last year I just told myself that it was my fear of him dying on the motorbike that made me have that dream.  My fiance and I also had a good night the night before he passed on.  I dream him alot, the first time he was crying and it broke my heart, the second time he was laughing and showing me all of his stuff that I wanted to keep and he asked me while laughing "Natali you're keeping all this stuff" so I decided to only keep a few things, the third time I dreamt he kissed me and it felt real, the fourth time he looked sad and I gave him a hug and it also felt real. I feel sad still because that was the last time I dreamt him and he looked sad.  Lots of people tell me to move on but it's really not that easy, I can't even dream about being with anyone else just as Amberly said she would feel like she's hurting his feelings.  Some people say it would get better with time but so far I miss him more and more each day.  Amberly you are not alone, I feel the same way.  My heart is broken.


Rhonda wrote at 2013-02-02 00:07:52
I too lost my fiance nine days age on Jan. 21st, 2013. I am absolutely devastated and do not really know how to handle the grief. I have been reading books but these only help so much. Unfortunately, I didn't get closure with my fiance before he died. I didn't get to say goodbye because he was pretty much in a coma. Also, I worry about his soul. I have prayed very hard for his soul and continue to pray that he is indeed in heaven. Some days are worse than others. I too moved because I couldnt handle seeing the town that held the memories everyday. I am very emotional anyway and now it is very bad. I suppose all I can do is to keep praying for relief. Just pray for guidance, relief from the pain, and the right direction to take with your life. That is what I am trying. Also, I am seeing a therapist and she is helping with my grief and depression.


HeavensMother wrote at 2013-02-02 19:03:42
Reading all your stories kills me inside. I've lost my fiance last January 28, 2013. Yes that was so recent! It hurts me by just looking at the calendar with that date! He's memorial is today and I can't compose myself. I feel like some part of me died with him. I still think this was all a long dream and would wake up anytime soon and that everything is alright and then he gonna call me then I will come home then we'll get married. My pain feels like hell. Help me.


Coping with Loss

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Rondi Lightmark

Expertise

How to deal with the loss of a loved one, after-death communication, dreams, paranormal experiences, self-care, widowhood, grieving in general.

Experience

I have a Masters in psychology with an emphasis on consciousnes and spirituality. I was widowed ten years ago and experienced many extraordinary encounters with my husband, some of which are published on my website http://www.healgrief.com. I have also published some of my experiences in the book "When a Lifemate Dies; Stories of Love, Loss and Healing" - Fairview Press, written on healing your body from grief in Body & Soul Magazine, worked as a hospice bereavement counselor - and read my work at Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, New York and on Northeast Public radio.

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