Expert: Dennis777 - 5/26/2004

Question
Hello,

I guess Im trying to justify my relationship. I am currently 20 years old and turning 21. I feel that I am mature beyond my age and find myself always being attracted to older men with direction and sense. I am presently in a relationship of 2 years (come Sept.)and I am enjoying it. My partner is 33.  Recently it has been brought to my attention that some people find our relationship ackward. I have grown up in a tight knit community that thrives on gossip and image. Our relationship is one of affection, prosperity and fun...my partner is young at heart and is concerned that I enjoy my life and fullfill every dream, but after becoming aware of the discontent of some of my friends and peers I have been stressing about our image together. He is attractive looking, secure and our relationship is based soley on our connection BUT I worry to much about what others think and I am trying to find ways to constructively deal with our image issues. I know that I can not convince others to agree but for our relationships sake I need to find an answer. I find myself floating farther away as I deal with the stress of this issue...but yet I can't let go because I know this is something good. I thought of moving etc. but you can't always run away from your problems.  If you have advice...please write me...  

Answer
Hello Nicole.

Sending you a Great Big Hug.

Your right you can't run away from your problems. I think the problem isn't what others are saying i think its what your feeling inside thats hurting you. I think you agree with them about the ages and your not wanting to admit it to yourself. If you where secure with the relationship your friends and family would be also after 2 years.

Look inside at what you want from life. Not what he wants or what others want for you but what YOU WANT...

Once you know what you want then do it. If some people don't like it then its their problem not yours.

Good Luck
Dennis