AboutNori J. Muster Expertise I can address problems with juvenile delinquents, adolescents at risk, abuse survivors, cult members and families. If you`re trying to get your life back after a cult or cult-like secular group experience, or if you have a family member or friend who has joined a cult, please write to me.
Experience My background is in counseling, but ever since my book came out, I have met more people who need help. My area of expertise is working with juvenile delinquents, cult members and people at risk for joining cults, troubled teenagers and families, and people with sexual abuse and other child abuse problems.
Organizations I belong to a variety of cultural and environmental organizations.
Publications I have several books out (check Amazon.com or Google.com) and other writing posted at my personal website, Surralist.org
Education/Credentials B.A. in Sociology, University of California, Santa Barbara, 1978
MS in Interdisciplinary Studies, Western Oregon State College, 1992. My master's thesis is about using art therapy with juvenile sex offenders.
Awards and Honors Betrayal of the Spirit (my first book) won an award for best selling book in its category, at Amazon.com, 1998.
Expert: Nori J. Muster Date: 7/9/2008 Subject: Run Away maids life style in Saudi Arabia
Question Run Away maids life style in Saudi Arabia
Many women from under developing and third world countries came to work as a house maid in foreign countries of Middle East by getting the visa. In Saudi Arabia, they ran from their sponsor’s home because their legal salary structure is lesser but when they work illegally to other’s home, there salary amount is greater. They usually take help of the male workers to run away. These male partners provide them the illegal jobs in home. Sometimes they ask commission for this service, both from house maids and employer, while others usually abuse them sexually. These house maids came to their homes after every other week in holiday and spend the night with them.
The second condition is that, many women from the under developing and third world countries enter in Kingdom fake motive of pilgrimage but they aim to over stay. They search work in local homes as the house maids. Their procedure to work is the same. They find male companions who provide them work.
Many of them earn the money by having sexual relations. They steal the things, working on their own conditions and behave irresponsibly and unethically. They kick out the job at a slight objection from their employer as they know that they can find hundred with the same salary level.
Probably there can be the other reasons of running away from the sponsor’s home like beating; torturing, humiliating, wages upholding and so on. But the greediness of earning more salary amount is also a significant reason.
Please comments on the social, psychological and specific reasons of this particular stigma.
Thanking you,
Sameera Aziz
Answer Dear Sameera,
Thank you for your letter and for informing me about a problem of exploitation in Saudi Arabia. You ask me to comment on the social, psychological and specific reasons for this problem. This is just my opinion and there are probably other viewpoints, but I see this as a legalized form of exploitation of women. It probably goes on widely, but nobody talks about it. These are the types of secret arrangements that would have to stop if they were out in the open. Due to poverty and need, the women are forced into the exploitation. Due to the ability to keep it secret, the male "employers" get to cheat on their wives. It is socially acceptable - if covert - prostitution.
That is it, plain and simple.
In Saudi Arabia, women must cover their bodies from top to bottom with cloth. They are not allowed to move about in society without a male relative accompanying them. From what I understand, women are expected to be cloistered and modest at all times, throughout their lives.
Then, unspoken arrangements exist for men to cheat on their women.
If people knew how to communicate better, and if they were more realistic about their desires, then they would not need adultery. If people were more compassionate and caring, we would have less poverty. If no poverty, then women would have more control over their own destiny.
To sum up, the social reasons are: forced modesty for women, lack of communication, and poverty. The psychological reasons are attempting to live a lie - the typical dysfunctional syndrome that leads to social systems breaking down. The specific reasons for this are the specific conditions for people in Saudi Arabia - Victorian morals about women, sex, lies, and sexual exploitation, as well as the specific conditions in the developing countries that lead women into a life of prostitution.
If you want to discuss further, please write back again.
Sincerely,
Nori
