Counseling/Excessive Fear


QUESTION: Dear Mr. Graig,

I am 46 years old indian, with chronic health anxiety since 12 years, first it started with heart attack, then heart disease, stroke, silent heart attack, MS, Arrhythmia, etc like many of them, I was reasearching to get relieved from the current fear & discovering another fear.This cycle is conitued till now. I always calm my mind that, if such & such thing happened then only it will happend. like before i was fearing about minor chest pain, that it is heart attack, after i convince my mind that, the heart attack pain should be for 10 minutes & above. So, like this i was fighting all this fear of different diseases. Before i consulted you regarding my fear of silent heart attack, your answer immensely help me & also the fear subside by one more logic that, silent heart attack should be only to those who have chronic uncontrolled diabetes & their nerve are damaged. by this logic the fear subside.
Now i am fearing about coronory artery spasm, which is a condition in which the artery goes to spasm for temporary with only blockage, it is like angina, which is very rare, i dont know i came across in one anxiety site, since then i am obsessing that i got coronory artery spasm.  i am making cognitive tips, like it should very painful & appears in night only or it is common mainly in women. Smoking & hyperlipidimia are main causes etc. but i don't able to calm my mind. i am fearing that if there is no pain or it could be silent, becoz most of the time i feel chest pressure.
Until now was ok, it was anxiety but controlled. The problem is Last 6 years i made an ecg, which was abnormal & probably it was Ischemia. but later i made several before & after many ecg, echo & treadmill test which all came negative with ischemia (blockage) Now my mind is obsessing with that old ecg that, due to anxiety it was coronary artery spasm & until now it is not detected, as it will show no blockage & now i am fearing that it is the same old.
I am fearing that, due to my anxiety is it possible the ecg can show ischemia.
& now whenever there is little fear, i am fearing the it could be coronary artery spams

Mr. Graigh you have great logic & your previous answer has helped me a lot. I know i am trapped in fear vicious cycle. but how to get out of this. I know you cannot help me that much, all i have to make effort to get out.
but i will be very grateful to you all my life if you help me come out this fear.
Where i am staying, we don't have good phyciatrist, therepist to help me.
Thank u & god bless u.
Plz help me i am very feared, i cannot walk or sleep due to this fear.

ANSWER: Hi Afzal,

Iím not sure what Iíve written before, as it apparently has been a long time. From your writing I can tell that youíre still bothered by fear.

Regardless of how you feel, youíve got to realize that the fear mechanism basically says, ďI want what I fear to happen to me.Ē Until you recognize this, youíll continue to be bothered by it, because it is something you want. How is that?

Your subconscious mind canít tell the difference between a real and imagined experience. It sees everything as a positive experience. When you feed it with a concern about something, like heart problems or some of the other maladies you mentioned, and you consciously express that you donít want that, your subconscious mind interprets that as I want it.

The subconscious mind's responsibility is to take what you choose consciously and produce it in your life. The more you speak to it with emotional energy, the more seriously it takes what you want. It works faithfully, objectively, to produce that in your life.

A prime example. If you fear coronary artery spasm, and you feed that to your subconscious mind, what youíre really saying is I want coronary artery spasm, subconsciously. Of course, consciously you donít want that. The subconscious doesnít care.

How do you remedy this situation?

You have to recognize that what you fear is what you want. You have to make an effort to stop wanting coronary artery spasm. You have to tell yourself, words to the effect, ďI want coronary artery spasm. I recognize that now. I now let go of wanting the condition of coronary artery spasm.

You must also deal with the feelings connected with that fear. If I havenít given you that process, please let me know and Iíll share that with you.

Does all this make sense?

Graig :-)

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Dear Graig,

I am very grateful to you for replying me. While getting reassurance from the site related to coronary artery spasm, i came across the way to diagnose is to hyperventilate the patient. since then i got more feared. Now i am fearing if i hyperventilate i will get coronary artery spasm. I know that it is wrong, but i started obsessing about the word hyperventilation. If it is like that, all anxious people who hyperventilate will get coronary artery spasm. I am trap in to fear. plz help me to come out of the vicious cycle of fear. I will be grateful to you all my life. I have two kids & wife. I don't have any help from anyone. i am fighting this fear since 12 years alone with out any help from anyone. I know anxiety causes hyperventilation, i am misinterpreting all this symptoms. plz give me the process to come out of this fear. God bless you.

ANSWER: Afzal,

You can't solve the problem with the process that created it in the first place. You're just going to get more of the problem.

You have to let go of the churning of the mind, wanting answers for everything. The answer lies in the fear you're experiencing. As I pointed out, your subconscious mind is obeying you and giving you what you want. Stop wanting that. When you do, all that will disappear. It is only there because you want it.

Afzal, do you see this?

Let it go. Release it. It wants to go, because you are talking to me about it and expressing it. It is just energy in the form of your thoughts. You control your thoughts. You are the responsible one.

Do you want me to show you how to let go of these things?

Graig :-)

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Dear Graig,

I am unable to rest or sleep, my mind is only thinking of heart, whether i am anxious or panic, this create more anxiety and fear of coronary artery spasm. Please help me. Please show how to let go of these things.


You are like this.  It is as if you  had a giant eel in your hand, squeezing it, refusing to let it go, and all the while it continues to bite you. If you open your hand and let it go, it will be gone and the longer bite you.

Are you get tired of holding on to this fear? If so, pay attention to what I am about to say.

Say to yourself, "I now see my problem. I really want what I fear will happen, about my heart. Could I let go of wanting this to happen? Would I let it go? When?"

Now, think of this negative thing about your heart. Say to yourself, "I let go of wanting this to happen to me."

Think of the problem again, and say to yourself, "I let go of wanting this to happen to me." Then just, in a sense, open your hand and let it go. Just release it.

Continue to practice this. When the thought comes again, accompanied by the feeling, measure the intensity on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the most high. Then say several more times, "I let go of wanting (whatever you fear is going to happen to you regarding your heart or anything else) to happen to me.

Recheck the intensity.  Has it gone down any?

Continue until it's gone down some.Remember, you are letting go of the wanting.

This may sound simple. It works when you are serious about not wanting it anymore and willing to let it go.

Let me know how you're progressing.

Graig :-)


All Answers

Answers by Expert:

Ask Experts


Graig Yarbrough


Most of the problems you have, are connected to your emotions. Your body follows your mind. What you think or have been thinking, you express in your body. That includes, pain, sickness, and anxiety. If you experience anger, that experience is a bodily feeling event. These feelings motivate behavior. Think of how you behaved the last time you experienced anger. What would that experience be like if there was no anger? These experiences color everything you do. Learn more about this and ways you can release these feeling states for the freedom you desire.


I have been counseling here on AllExperts for over 15 years. I have over 100 hours in personal counseling. I have experience in both individual and group counseling. I am an advocate of Energy Psychology and a practitioner of FasterEFT. Are you tired of taking about it and are ready to fix it? I thoroughly enjoy helping other people with the knowledge I have to share!

I have a B.A Degree and many hours of self-study. I have about 120 graduate hours in sociology. I was an Equal Opportunity Adviser for the US Army for three years. I am US Army Retired.
I am a graduate of the US Army Primary Leadership Course, Basic Non-commissioned Officers Course, and Advanced Non-commission course. I am a graduate of the Defense Equal Opportunity Management Institute.

I am a graduate of the Longridge Writer's Group. I am a graduate of Star Power, level 1. I am a student of FasterEFT and the release technique.

©2017 All rights reserved.