Counseling/Incest

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Question
I am a 26 year with two children, 10 and 6.
My father fondled me while we were swimming and later ask if I would "go off with him." I resisted his advances, but I have been unable to get this situation out of my mind. It ya has haunted me for a long time.
What can I do to removed

Answer
Hi Jackie,

How are you?

Thank you for asking me a question regarding your concern and as usually I response with a reminder (especially if the issue is quite sensitive) to make sure to seek professional help to be able to have a follow-up on your query.  

The answer to your question concerns how this father is related to you: a biological father or a step-dad.  If this is a biological father, the reason why somehow it does affect you a lot and a long time is you being disrespected.  If this a step-dad, this is something different because you feel disrespecting your mom.  No matter what, the effect is disrespect and it is not a good feeling as it did real happen to you.   

The next factor that could be help or not help you is related to your marital status:
a) being a single mom or divorcee- usually men think that they are easy to get because they are looking for companionship and that in general men think that it is okay for single mom/ divorcee to get hooked for a date or one night stand.

b) being married still with a husband can either be helpful because your husband can help you face the issue.  He can actually file a case to your dad or even you can do it as if there is a real situation this is considered grounds for sexual harrassment.  

c) being married still with a husband can be negative in some ways as depending on how he is able to take it against you and your dad and he might just give your dad a blow on the stomach.  

So the suggestion takes you to a professional counselor/legal assistance in order for you to cope this situation as your children (if they are both females) might also encounter the same situation with their grandfather.

I hope this helps you and please do not delay to get help while still you can.  Take care and all the best

Maia  

Counseling

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Maia

Expertise

I can answer any counseling concern related to coping with stress, emotional imbalance, sibling rivalry, marital relationship, spiritual confusion that affected/affecting and will affect your well-being. I am not the usual "what is in the box!" type of counselor. I am very polite and gentle but direct to help you understand your situation. I also use pastoral technique to help you understand that human needs supernatural power from the source in order to cope with stressors. Please be informed that I am very much welcoming in any questions you would like to ask but PLEASE DON'T BE RUDE in the stating the subject/concern. ANY FOUL LANGUAGE can restrict me to entertain your queries. Thank you very much.

Experience

I am a Counselor with BS Behavioral Sciences degree. I have experienced in counseling both individual and groupd sessions. I have conducted a lot of workshops related to peer counseling and healthy mind body and spirit related topic. I did a couple of thesis counseling session when I used to work in a Medical College. I have been commended for my research work. My passion is to listen and be able to assist anyone who needs problem-solving solution.

Organizations
Psychological Educators' Society (2001-2004)

Education/Credentials
BS Behavioral Sciences Counselor for 5 years Researcher for 2 years Psychometrician for 2 years Adept in counseling, use of psychological testing and administration and interpretation/use e-clectic technique

Awards and Honors
Graduated with Honours (CLINICAL OFFICE ASSISTANT)

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