Expert: BethB - 4/14/2009

Question
I was looking for two songs and can't remember them. The first one the woman is talking about putting a bar in her house for her husband and his buddies. The second song is "he drinks tequilla while she speaks dirty in spanish" can someone please help me its driving me nuts.

Answer
***The first one is David Frizzell's "I'm Gonna Hire a Wino to Decorate Our Home," and here are those lyrics:

"I came crawling home last night, like many nights before:
I finally made it to my feet as she opened up the door.
And she said, "You're not gonna do this anymore."

She said: "I'm gonna' hire a wino to decorate our home,
"So you'll feel more at ease here, and you won't have to roam.
"We'll take out the dining room table, and put a bar along that wall.
"And a neon sign, to point the way, to our bathroom down the hall."

She said: "Just bring your Friday paycheck, and I'll cash them all right here.
"And I'll keep on tap - for all your friends, their favorite kinds of beer.
"And for you, I'll always keep in stock, those soft aluminum cans.
"And when you're feeling macho, you can crush them like a man."

She said: "We'll rip out all the carpet, and put sawdust on the floor.
"Serve hard boiled eggs and pretzels, and I won't cook no more.
"There'll be Monday night football, on T.V. above the bar.
"And a pay phone in the hallway, when your friends can't find their car."

She said: "I'm gonna' hire a wino to decorate our home,
"So you'll feel more at ease here, and you won't have to roam.
"We'll take out the dining room table, and put a bar along that wall.
"And a neon sign, to point the way, to our bathroom down the hall."

She said: "You'll get friendly service, and for added atmosphere.
"I'll slip on something sexy, and I'll cut it clear to here.
"Then you can slap my bottom, every time you tell a joke.
"Just as long as you keep tipping, well, I'll laugh until you're broke."

She said: "Instead of family quarrels, we'll have a bar-room brawl,
"When the Ham's bear say's its closing time, you won't have far to crawl.
"And when you run out of money, you'll have me to thank.
"You can sleep it off next morning, when I'm putting it in the bank."

She said: "I'm gonna' hire a wino, to decorate our home,
"So you can feel more at ease here, and you won't have to roam.
"When you and your friends get off from work, and have a powerful thirst.
"There won't be any reason, why you can't stop off here first."

She said: "I'm gonna' hire a wino to decorate our home,
"So you'll feel more at ease here, and you won't have to roam.
"We'll take out the dining room table, and put a bar along that wall.
"And a neon sign, to point the way, to our bathroom down the hall.""


***And the second song is Lorrie Morgan and Sammy Kershaw's duet of "He Drinks Tequila, She Talks Dirty in Spanish."  Here are those lyrics:

"Everybody knows her,little Miss Rosa
The queen of the trailer park
Well,she's a hot pepper and you'll never forget her
If you ever let her break your heart
Señor Jose,works all day
Sweatin' in the red hot sun
Row after row,everybody knows
What they do when the weekend comes

He drinks tequila,and she talks dirty in spanish
Him in his sombrero,her in her purty pink jammies
The dance all night to the Mariachis
Till there ain't nobody left standin'
He drinks tequila,and she talks dirty in spanish

Well,the music is blarin' and the neighbors are starin'
That whole dang trailer is a-rockin'
Jose's a-howling',the Chihuahua's growlin'
And Rosie's peelin' off her silk stockings
"Your so naughty,kiss my body,abráceme fuerte"
"Ay,ay ay ay ay,hoochie-coo,toda la noche"

He drinks tequila,and she talks dirty in spanish
Him in his sombrero,her in her purty pink jammies
The dance all night to the Mariachis
Till there ain't nobody left standin'
He drinks tequila,and she talks dirty in spanish

He drinks tequila,and she talks dirty in spanish
Him in his sombrero,her in her purty pink jammies
The dance all night to the Mariachis
Till there ain't nobody left standin'
He drinks tequila,and she talks dirty in spanish"


Hope this helps!
--Beth