Expert: Jean M Mahan - 6/6/2010

Question
I don't know if you are familiar with micro expression training programs, but I was wondering if you knew what the difference is between Paul Eckman's "Mett" training and MiX training. Which is better and why. If you are not familiar with these programs, then tips on how to train oneself to tell if someone is lying would be greatly appreciated. Thanks you.

Answer
First, sorry that it took so long for me to answer, I was without Internet access for 10 days.
As for your question, no I am not familiar with micro expression training programs. I attended a couple of workshops on lying and of course, worked with anti-social personalities for many years. Some ways to spot lying include; discrepancy between social context of words and emotional expression, i.e., "My little girl is missing" and a blank or smiling face with no emotional response. In other words whatever they are saying doesn't match what the average person would feel and express. They may also look around at others for clues for what emotion they should be expressing, but the emotion mimic is pathetic.Sociopaths don't have normal emotions, and are puzzled by them.

Another way is to watch their eyes, lying always produces nervous responses, even with psychopaths. Look out when anyone closes or hides their eyes when they tell you something, look out when someone turns their head to the side and looks downward while answering you.

Another way is to watch their breathing and pulse rate if you can. This takes some trial and effort to train yourself to see the rate of breathing and the pulse perhaps in the forehead or neck. Lie detectors are based on this principal, rapid breathing and increased pulse rate equal lying.

Another way is to dare to challenge what they say when you know they are lying. A normal person might become angry and argue, or they may listen to what you have to say. A liar will always rant to you, push verbally and perhaps physically (moving closer, shoving) anything to intimidate you into agreeing with them. They will also attack your character, throw things at you that you did wrong or they think was wrong. They just get plain nasty and insulting, and by doing so put you on the defensive. When on the defensive, a person doesn't notice that the subject has been changed, and in the confusion created totally forgets what started the whole thing. Somehow everything ends up your fault.

Hope this helps, Jean