You are here:

Critics of Jehovah`s Witnesses/I believe jehovah witness is a CULT!!!

Advertisement


Question
Hello,
I have been dating this beautiful girl for two years.  She is a non-practicing lutheran as of current.  I am a catholic that believes very very strongly in my religion.  She is in the process of becoming a Witness.  She is being brainwashed by two very prominent figures in her life.  First her mother. What her mom says is law in her house and her mom wants to become a witness but her husband put a stop to it promtly.  Now she has her three daughters believing that being a witness is the only truth out there. Second is Becky her former babysitter. Becky basically raised her and her sisters.  So what she says is always right as well.  She is teaching her the ways and beliefs of the witnesses and I think it is a cult.  From the basic knowledge I know of them it sounds like they are probably drinking Kool-aid during the meetings she is having right now.  Anyhow  I want some answers of the witnesses.  The main reason for my disagreeing with her decision is because she has changed over night, and has become very hypocritical to thing that a week ago were the norm for her.  So info on this cult, would be very helpful.
thanks,
Joshua

Answer
Dear Joshua,

I agree completely. Jehovah's Witnesses are a cult. What I mean by this is that they use all the tactics of cult mind control. There is a very finite and specific set of tactics used, and the same ones are used by all cults, because there is only one way to influence people as cults do.

Fortunately, suicides among Witnesses do not occur en masse. Unfortunately, suicides among disillusioned former Witnesses are extremely common. So perhaps you can take comfort at least to a degree that suicide is unlikely for your girlfriend until she breaks a rule and gets expelled by the Witnesses. (It becomes very likely after that.) This is a great risk because the Witnesses expel tens of thousands of members EACH YEAR for rule breaking, and the rules are unimaginably extensive, so they're very easy to break.

There is lots of information on the Witnesses available if you know where to look. Many Witnesses are waking up and beginning to recover from their nightmare thanks to the Internet.

The specific information I guess you're interested in is how you can help your girlfriend wake up before she gets in deeper. I wish there was a simple formula, but there isn't. Cult mind control is a complex series of psycho-social behaviors that, when used simultaneously, overwhelm a person's critical thinking faculties and make them give up their right to make decisions for themselves, and instead fully capitulate to the leadership of the organization.

In this case, there is no single leader, and the Witnesses use this as the basis for their claim that they are "not" a cult. However, that is fallacious reasoning; as it does not matter how many leaders there are. What matters is whether they use cult tactics. Witnesses most assuredly do, just as you have suspected. The Witness leadership consists of elders: Local elders, travelling elders, and elders who work at the various Watchtower facilities. They write all Watchtower literature, which tells Witnesses what to think and say and do. Elders have absolute power over the lives of individual Witnesses.

There are constraints within which elders are SUPPOSED to operate; but when an organization uses totalitarian methods, who supervises the supervisor? So abuse of power is very common. The most common abuse of power is when an individual elder uses his own personal interpretation of a situation or a verse, and speaks his own opinion as if it carried the authority of God himself. This happens all the time among Witnesses. So rank and file members have no freedom whatsoever. When confronted with an elder who has an opinion, a rank and file member must fully capitulate and allow his privacy to be invaded, and follow instructions precisely; or risk expulsion. There is always some situation that can be reframed to make expulsion appear justifiable, no matter how honorable or Christlike the member may have lived.

Since the system of conditioning (deception) is so complex, there is no simple way of overcoming it. Instead, an interested bystander must use deep understanding and subtlety. In order to do this, you have to educate yourself fairly extensively. By subtlety, I mean asking open-ended questions meant to stimulate her thinking but which do not raise her defenses. It is very difficult to walk that razor's edge, and it requires great patience. If you do it skillfully and patiently for a long period, there is a chance you might succeed. There are no guarantees.

Do not expect common sense to work. Do not expect that all you have to do is find irrefutable "proof" and show it to her and that will break the spell. It doesn't work that way. Once a new recruit is under the influence of the Witnesses, they have ways of explaining away even the most compelling evidence.

If you're sure you want to start down this road, I suggest you read some books. If you have money to spend, you might want to hire a consultant. The best consultant and author, in my estimation, is Steven Hassan. You can find him on the Internet. There are many others. Another useful web site with a wealth of information about the Witnesses is http://freeminds.org

Please let me know if you have any specific questions or if I can help further.

Best wishes,
AndrewXJW

Critics of Jehovah`s Witnesses

All Answers


Answers by Expert:


Ask Experts

Volunteer


Andrew

Expertise

I don't object to Witness theology, but rather their use of social pressure & deceptive manipulations to undermine family ties and control minds. (This may seem contradictory to Witnesses, who draw no distinction between spiritual belief and organizational policy.) I do not engage in theological debate. I support persons impacted by an experience with the Witnesses and advocate early education for everyone so that they can protect themselves from cults by understanding what to watch out for. (It's not what most people think.)

(Ex-)Witnesses: I know how upsetting it is to experience doubts (or anger) about your experience. Time does not heal this wound until you first remove the splinter, which takes more time and effort than you may realize. So, unless you have already put in that time and effort, don't be surprised if you are deeply affected long after the experience. But there is good news! You're NOT an enemy of God for doubting or for failing to meet the requirements of a human organization. An organization that lies cannot be the exclusive spokesman for the God of Truth. Tell me where you're at. I'll understand. I can show you how to begin or continue your recovery and make a life for yourself worth living.

Non-Witnesses: Describe your experience with your friend/relative who is (becoming) a Witness. I can help you understand the Witness indoctrination and social dynamics that are affecting him or her. I can help you put your options into perspective. Keep in mind that people do make their own choices (even though they may sometimes do so under outside influence) and you may not be able to affect this person's choices, even though they impact on you. After all, you do not have the arsenal of tactics that a cult does (and wouldn't want to). A few people manage to save their friend/relative, but don't count on it. What you can count on is navigating the maze more successfully by becoming more informed about your own options.

Experience

I was a Witness for 30 years, and a volunteer at their headquarters in Brooklyn, New York, for a year. I have attended meetings with many Witness congregations across the United States, a thorough cross-section, carefully observing patterns of behavior. Although being a Witness was difficult, and I gradually had more and more doubts about Witness teachings--I was a true believer, so I kept trying to make it work somehow. I stopped attending meetings in 1997 only after receiving an answer to a prayer about doing so, and have since been actively involved in recovery. This includes both my own and supporting others in theirs. Recovery can include reading books, communicating with others in recovery, and participating in support groups and/or therapy. It always involves reclaiming one's own mind and discovering the other sides of the issues that you have been blinded to in the past.

My gradual awakening was socially, psychologically, and spiritually tumultuous. I lost everything from my former life. My suffering was substantial.

But I have gained everything, so it was worth it. Only after beginning my recovery did I gain social, psychological, and spiritual healing and growth, peace of mind, and self-respect. Only then did I discover who I am; and--for the first time--the meaning of real brotherly love.

For more resources on this topic, try these web sites:
http://freeminds.org/
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/freedomofmind/



Education/Credentials
Like most Cult Recovery Counselors, I am a cult survivor. I have life experience, not professional training. Also I feel no need to apologize for that. People with professional training cannot understand what it is like to survive a cult unless they have been through it themselves, which few professional therapists have. Understanding what really happened and what works in this unusual social context is as important as psychological training. Most professional therapists are not specifically trained to support cult survivors. Those who are represent a rare and precious resource.

I sometimes refer people to professional therapists regarding deep personal issues. But surviving a cult is a broad experience with other dimensions. Professional therapy can be very helpful as part of your recovery process, assuming that you choose the right therapist. When choosing a therapist, remember that you are the client and they are a service provider. You are the one who holds authority about the relationship. You get to interview the therapist and decide which one to employ.

Be sure to ask what specific training and experience they have around recovery from cult mind control. Most therapists do not have relevant training. Some carry serious misunderstandings about what cult mind control is; and therefore will misunderstand your struggle. So it pays to be selective as a consumer of professional therapy services.

Past/Present Clients
The Witness organization is not like other churches. Most non-Witnesses really cannot imagine what it is like to be a Witness. The organization has unimaginably extensive rules and monitoring that affect every aspect of life, so there is no privacy and no sense of personal independence. "Independent thought" is considered their greatest "sin".

The organization insists on absolute conformity, and claims to directly represent God; so dissent is not tolerated, and authority is totalitarian. Being a Witness is more like living in China or the former Soviet Union than being a member of a religion as you know it. It was the research of Robert J. Lifton, who was studying--not religions--but totalitarian governments, who first began to illuminate the problem of religious cults around the world, which employ exactly the same tactics as totalitarian governments. His work remains a cornerstone for Cult Recovery Counselors still today. (This may be why many governments are tolerant of cults, to avoid exposing their own control tactics.)

Witnesses often experience unusually dysfunctional lives and an extensive array of personal problems stemming from broken family ties, stunted social development, inner unrest resulting from repressed doubts, inability to defend boundaries, and an extreme, persistent feeling of irrational shame. I can help people impacted by an experience with the Witnesses by revealing in detail the policies and social dynamics in the Witness organization that cause these problems.

©2012 About.com, a part of The New York Times Company. All rights reserved.