Expert: Gordon Cook - 8/8/2010

Question
my boyfriend is a Jehovah witness and his whole family a Jehovah witness and
I'm a Christian and my whole family a Christian we have been dating for over
a little of three years! i love him so much but when i talk about religion with
him we end up getting into a huge fight not talking for the whole day!! my
mother really likes him sometimes she talks to him about the bible he listens
and then when i leave out the house with him he starts talking crazy like what
your mom was saying was not true and he try to compare his bible with our
bible and then he gets soo frustrated when he cant find things and the bible
so he calls his family members for help to look it up! and by the way hes a
little older than me but we are both adults! me and his family get along
somewhat his mother doesn't really talk that much english so i could say
thats better for me! my boyfriend talks about rejoining his Jehovah witness
religion and he tells me that the only reason he doesnt is because i wont let
him! i really do feel sometimes our love could overcome this religion thing
but no it wont! i really just need some advice ive had it up to my neck with
this ive shad alot of tears over this and we talk about marriage sometimes but
something inside of him avoids it! we also can not determine whether or not
he wants to have kids with me! i really want kids get married and have a nice
family but with the way things r going it doesnt look like were going to last! i
dont wanna break up with my boyfriend but i dont know what to do anymore!  
i just need someone to help me

Answer
Hi
Firstly let me say that this is a common problem, with a JW and a non-JW. Also I'm surprised that he has been allowed to date you for so long. JWs do not generally like a JW dating a non-JW, they believe that a JW should only marry a JW. They see non-JWs, especially Christians, as being totally wrong in their beliefs.
That JWs only have the true religion. You can see that when he has talks with your mother, no matter what she says, she is wrong.
Unfortunately with the JW relgion, love does not come into it, the religion, serving the Watchtower organisation comes above all else.
Also if he was to leave the JWs his whole family would stop having anything to do with him.
I know this because when I left,my JW wife and two daughters, stopped having anything to do with me. They have not had contact with for for the past ten years. This is the kind of religion you are dealing with. I'm just one of thousands of who it has happened too.
Check out the experiences on this forum you will find help here also :
http://exjehovahswitnessforum.yuku.com
also http://jwfacts.com
will give you and idea of their beliefs.

You say he is thinking about "rejoining" the JWs. Does this mean he has not been to meetings and on the door-to-door work? If so then they could be putting pressure on him to return. If he does start attending meetings again, you can be sure they will put pressure on him to stop seeing you. He probably knows this, but won't admit it.
When he says you are stopping him returning, this is what he means, if he does, he will have to finish with you.
If you decide to become a JW, be prepared for a life of being controlled by them. You want children, would you be prepared to let one of them die, because you had to refuse a blood transfusion, as JWs teach.

I'm afraid that this is a situation in which both of you will have to sit down and have a serious talk.