Expert: Gordon Cook - 2/9/2011

Question
QUESTION: Hi Gordon,
Got your last reply. I couldn't reply to the last email you sent me.  All that you say is true...I know about disfellowshiping & the shunning...You know I think that most Witnesses who don't associate with their own family who are non-Witnesses...were that way before they became Witnesses, now they have a reason and backup. Many folks who had personality problems before they became religious all religion did was to enhance those ways.  They become judgmental & don't think they weren't that way before. My study partner & I are great friends we really get along...when things happen to her...she doesn't really call anyone else from her hall. We don't attend the same hall. She calls me. I'm not baptized & taking a long time as far as she is concerned to take to the "Truth".  But she said if I decide not to go further she & I would not really associate too much..Ummm....so that means she's a fair weather friend. I do know this she will miss me & so will her family. By studying with them, I'm the same gal...but I see things differently. I believe in Jesus as giving his life for me & try to treat everyone with respect and try to encourage & help folks when & where I can. You are right because they are afraid to leave because they got rid of all their friends & only made friends in the hall...So they don't have an outside support system. Instead of having friends that maybe don't want to join the witnesses but have faith, they could still associate with them... I have new friends in the hall but how long will this last if I don't get baptized. FYI: I was baptized when I was 12.  I went to a Lutheran School & that's where I was baptized (sprinkle on the forehead). I dare not tell my study partner 'cause she'll just say...that doesn't count.  What I do notice is now my study partner says that when she goes out to knock on doors & preach, she tries to address their needs instead of pounding the bible in their heads...well...when we first starting studying...this is what I pointed out..if you pass someone that needed something to eat...would you give them a WT or a sandwich or cup of coffee ? Back then she said..a WT...I told her...picture this ....if you give them a sandwich or coffee the first time they will remember you & take a WT or even at that time they would accept a WT. So now she's echoing my words...but she thinks it's her idea.  I won't say anything about that 'cause it's not worth it. I told her many times folks just need for you to sit with them while they sought out their mess...then maybe they'll be open to the gospel...then again maybe not. Witnesses have issues like everyone else. They have a certain sadness in their eyes....they read alot...which if you are single keeps you busy from dating...married couples barely have time for each other or their children.  I think that's the whole idea keep'em busy so they won't see or hear nothing else but they are told. I wouldn't question their teachings..how I do that is point out certain things...once I was driving a couple of sisters home after the meeting, & said to them...we are not to judge folks 'cause we don't know where they come from & the sun rises on the good & the bad...one of the sisters said...wow she hadn't heard that for a long time.  Because they stay in their own little world...I point out different things to them to wake them up...& all they can say to my statements is....THAT'S TRUE....

Ann

ANSWER: Hi Ann,

Sorry not replied sooner have been away.
I was at a Christian convention, were I gave a talk on the JWs and how they are controlled.

You make a valid point about your  study partner, who said  you would stay friend but on a limited basis is you did not become a JW. This is an examp;e of how JWs show "conditional love" as long as you are going along with them, you are OK soon as you start asking awkward questions, or not showing interest any more, then they will become cool towards you.

You saying about them addressing peoples needs. The JW do no charitable work,that is, not helping of the homeless, drug addicts, alcholics, etc. If disaster situations, hurricanes, floods etc, you will not find JWs setting up soup kitchens or supplying food,clothing or shelter. If you do it will be only for other JWs, as many who have experienced it will say.

I like the phrase you used in describing JWs - "they have a certain sadness in their eyes"

They are constantly told they are not doing enough, or that "the end" is near.
They are burdened down by rules and regulations, imposed by the Watchtower.
When Jesus said He would lift the burdens off them and not impose any on any of His followers.

Without the Watchtower organisation torely on, they would be lost.
There life is not one of following Christ, but following a man-made religion.

Christ came to earth not to start a religion, but a relationship.



---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Hi Gordon,
Hope you enjoyed your time off...I would have liked to have gone to that Christian convention...This weekend is the Witnesses 2 day convention. This is another pep rally...When I look around just before lunch & a little after lunch I notice folks drifting off to sleep. After many of them being a witness for so many yrs...I guess that would happen...but then they offer a new book or track...& the whole place is so excited....the only way I can express it is....IT'S CORNY...I've asked why they don't do charitable work & they say it's better to save a person's life...then they point out the various places that are charitable & say they are bogus...So if that's the case...Show us how it should be done...Show the world that if Witnesses did charitble work how to run it like God would have wanted..Be the Example...I don't think they are told they aren't doing enough...but every meeting is about going out there & getting a study...be a pioneer...so even though they don't say you're not doing enough they say it in another way.  I like going to the hall but you can't stay unless you want to preach & teach....I know they are wondering about me...I make most of the meetings...'cuz I like them & learn alot...again I read the bible on my own...Many of the scriptures they don't acknowlege & I know why...for example the discreet slave...that's a parable..it's about being busy & on your faith game when Jesus comes...now how did they see that scripture to apply to them.  All religions are man made...The religion should be "The Bible"...everyone is trying to be so clever & name their division after something in the bible...like they are closer to God than the rest of the denominations.
The end is always near to them...& most likely it is...but we don't know & neither do they....Just like in the days of Noah...they didn't know. Being human we want to know everything...want to be prepared..not for this...many of the Witnesses today think they will see the end in this lifetime...maybe yes maybe no...Jesus came to undo what Adam & Eve did...life for a life...Hope to hear from you...

Be Well,

Ann

ANSWER: Hi Ann,

I'm quite sure that the Convention I attended was different to the JW one.

As you say the JW convention is more of a pep rally. More talks about "doing more" because "the end" is near. Funnily my talk at the convention was based on a person born a JW in 1960 and following his life up till today. His life started out with them telling him that Armageddon could be in 1975. A magazine article saying that for young ones there would be no use pursuing a career because they will never leave school, as Armegeddon would be hear in a short time.
This theme continues right through his life that "the end" is always "just around the corner" making him put off education and getting a career.
Other ex-JWs at the convention said to me afterwards,it was just  like listening to their life story.

Many ask about JW "charity" , their view is that helping a person "spiritually" is more important. That giving to a charity, is only short term, as soon Jehovah will sort things out.
Yes by killing everyone not a JW!
For example, when the Indonesian tsunami happened about 5 years ago. Some JWs wanted to give to disaster relief funds. They were told by the Watchtower it would be better to give to the organisations "Worldwide Work" fund, and the WT would use it,probably to further the preaching work.

Yes they probably are wondering why you have not been baptised yet.
You are right about the "faithful and discreet slave" they have misapplied this scripture to the "anointed" and primarily the Governing Body.
This is because they believed that Jehovah chose them, that is the "anointed", back in 1919 as his only people on earth. So there job as the "slave" is to "feed"  others who join the organisation.

They also teach that you can only gain salvation if you become a JW and obey the Watchtower.
Whereas Jesus said He was "the way, the truth and the life"
Also in Acts 16 when the jailer asked Paul what he must do to be saved, Paul just said "Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you and your household will be saved."

Like so many cults the Watchtower has added man-made rules to what Jesus said, and gone beyond what scripture says.

yours
Gordon



---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Hi Gordon,
I bet your convention was very very different. I could say so much about them....maybe Witnesses are spiritually weak & need an organization to keep them in line...Have you notice when they stop going to the hall & stumble they really stumble...not like they go to the bar & have a beer & maybe date..nope they really fall off the deep end 'til the only thing they can do is return to the hall. They are not folks who do stuff in moderation.  Most Christians do a little of this & a little of that. They are told what to think because maybe before they became witnesses they didn't listen to anyone let alone God or Jesus. I was speaking to one of the sisters I drive home....I told her she's the only one that has a light in her eyes...she is always smiling & happy. Most of the congregation thinks she's a little off...& maybe she is, but I much rather be her then the other dead eye folks.  Aren't Christians suppose to radiate...Folks are so amazed that I talk to everyone & sit with different folks when I attend the meetings...I judge no one....I know that most of the men hardly talk to me or make eye contact...but I understand they are guarding their eye gate....Men are visual...so I don't make a big deal of it...but I have pointed it out to several folks..& all they do is say well sometime the brothers have alot on their minds...I disagree, they are rude...& they have stuff on their minds...yes the do...what's on their mind is how to stay true to their wives after looking or trying not to look at other females...This I do understand but they won't say that...they give everyone in the hall an excuse for being rude or whatever, & chalk it up to "Well we are imperfect too"...Well Well Well....welcome to Earth...aren't we all...so far I found out that the same folks in the hall are the same folks in the world...except...in the hall they are given excuses but the world no excuses....we are heathens....does that sound judgemental ? ummm.  My Mom says they think too highly of themselves. They do but still have to go to the hall to remain humble..cuz you know they have an answer for everything...I use to give excuses for folks throwing me under the bus several times...now I call it what it is...once you know your characters you can deal with the different personalities of folks...Every one deserves respect, until they show different.  This Charity thing....I guess it's personal for them. I could answer them but what's the use. I agree man adds so much to Christianity that's not even in the bible...like why do women have to wear skirts....wouldn't that make a man's mind wander even more... Yes we are to dress modestly to go to any place of worship....you don't wear your evening attire, but when it's cold & you're running from the job to get to weekly meeting...why not wear a pair of slacks...& on Sunday I think it would be ok to wear a skirt...I agree with so much of what you say....I'm studying..not sure if I'll get baptized... My journey with God will reveal what God wants me to do...Also the witnesses say Preaching & Teaching is a commandement....I think it's a suggestion to the many things a christian can do...

Sincerely,

Ann

Answer
Hi Ann,

Having spent many years attending JW conventions, a Christian one is VERY different.
For a start no one finds it a chore to be there.
We are there for God not because of some organisation.

Yes some become JWs because it gives them something to hold on to,
a sense of belonging to something, taking part in something.

Unfortunately many who do leave the JWs, do sometimes go wild.
As if being set free.
Surveys have shown though that only about a quarter of those who leave ever return.
Also only 37% of those raised as JWs ever get baptised as JWs.
It is the lowest of all denominations for take up rate.
For instance here in Britain, last year they had 2,611 baptised.
But the total number of JWs only increased by 795, so where are the other 1,816.

They are are probably amazed that you talk to everyone and sit in different places.
Usually you find in Kingdom Halls they have different cliques of brothers and sisters.
Maybe made up of members of one family, or certain minds.
JW Men probably don't talk to you because they have this thing about not talking to a single woman, or even a woman talking to single man.
A man and woman should not date unless "it is with a view to marriage"

You will find many in a KH living double lives.
The JW life and the life they when they are with non-JWs or in private.
Some stories I know about them in that regard.

As to dress as you mention, JWs have a thing about a woman wearing slacks or jeans even.
Comes from the scripture that a person should not wear the clothes of the opposite sex.
Recall a sister being told off because she wore jeans in the house while decorating.

The thing is going to the KH does not make them humble it reinforces in them,
that only they are Gods people and they are above the world outside.

Not sure if these replies are public or private otherwise would give you my email address.
It would be easier than going through AllExperts.

yours
Gordon