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Critics of Jehovah`s Witnesses/Annoying Knocks on Doors
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Question
I am a Lutheran. I moved here 4 years ago and the JW have literally been dropping by for 4 years. If I'm not here Saturday, their new tact is a weekday.
No matter what I state my beliefs to be, they are met with a counter-position.
Faith? Not good enough.
Work? Not good enough.
Nothing is good enough but instead of ministering to someone who needs help, I am a target. My Lord & Savior would not make me feel uncomfortable on my own front porch. After four years, it is making me feel sick to my stomach. This is first time I ckd them out on line.
If I say my Savior is loving of many people, that's not good enough. Their view seems to be that most people are bad and the path is narrow - vips only. That's ridiculous. They are so negative about the world that goes against everything I believe. I've had enough. Just needed to vent. A real church enfolds, comforts and accepts. God does not push and ambush people at their front door. He is always with me and how will I stop answering the door just to be told no matter what I say, not good enough? They even do photocopies and HIGHLIGHT passages from the Bible - premeditated lecture brought w/them to my door. My life is good and they have been for four years trying to convince me that I need them. I do not. They are making me physically ill.
Dear Jo Kay,
Thanks for calling attention to this annoying Witness behavior. I'm sorry you've had such stress over this.
The Witnesses feel it's their proper place to aggressively grab onto the minds of other people and reorient them because they believe their form of faith is the only valid one.
Even though God has never given them any form of inspired leadership nor vision nor dream saying so, they have deluded themselves into believing that they are speaking pretty much directly on God's behalf, which makes them very stubborn.
So don't try to reason with them! They will consider anything you say a form of engagement, an opportunity to get a foot in the door to make their points in order to save your eternal life. They don't believe you when you tell them you're already saved. Their attitude in speaking to non-Witnesses is that they are condescending to your level because you don't know any better. How arrogant!
I agree a healthy supportive church should "enfold, comfort, and accept". That is absolutely not the way Witnesses operate. They are not a healthy supportive church, as you've found out the hard way. I agree God does not "push and ambush" people with mind games and pressure. God is love. The Witnesses have no concept of the true nature of God.
I will share with you some effective ways to get the Witnesses to stop knocking on your door: Make a sign about two inches high and 6 inches wide which reads, "Jehovah's Witnesses Are Not Welcome Here", and post it on the outside of your door about eye level. They may walk up to your door, but on seeing such a sign, they will typically walk away without knocking. They will pay no attention to any sign unless the sign specifically mentions them by name!
If they still violate your wishes by knocking and trying to engage you in unwanted debate, you are within your rights to go to the door with a glass of cold water and splash it on them. Do that once or twice and they will write down your address with a special message in their records which they call a "DO NOT CALL". (Don't worry about them writing down your address--that would be a good thing--since they visit all addresses that are not specifically noted as "DO NOT CALL's".)
This means they won't bother you in their regular rounds, but a Witness elder might come once a year to see if you've changed your mind. Even then, if he sees your sign specifically mentioning Jehovah's Witnesses is still on your door, he will probably leave you alone.
The law cannot help you because the Witnesses right to preach is Constitutionally protected. They've even gone so far as to take the issue to the US Supreme Court. (Sometimes the law does not understand the true nature of "freedom of religion".)
But their right to visit does not override your property rights, and they must leave when you ask them to do so, or they are trespassing and can be arrested for doing so. The difficulty for a modest reasonable Christian such as yourself, I suppose, is in finding the necessary inner grit to be assertive with them, because the Christian preference is to usually respond with mildness.
You deserve the peace of God that excels all thought, and based on what you've said, God has already brought you such peace, which you would be enjoying if not for the Witnesses' interference. How outrageous that they come taking away a gift God has given you!
I find it completely unacceptable how they try to wear down and weaken modest reasonable people hoping they will give in and accept their message.
In the spirit of "What Would Jesus Do", in view of how much stress their visits bring you, I suggest that if the Lord found himself in your situation, perhaps he would respect himself enough to put an end to it, even by splashing water on them if necessary.
Remember how he violently turned over the tables of the money changers in the temple, and drove out the cattle with whips? So perhaps it is proper even for Christians to be assertive at times, such as when defending their faith and spiritual health.
Best wishes,
AndrewXJW
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Andrew
Expertise
I don't object to Witness theology, but rather their use of social pressure & deceptive manipulations to undermine family ties and control minds. (This may seem contradictory to Witnesses, who draw no distinction between spiritual belief and organizational policy.) I do not engage in theological debate. I support persons impacted by an experience with the Witnesses and advocate early education for everyone so that they can protect themselves from cults by understanding what to watch out for. (It's not what most people think.)
(Ex-)Witnesses: I know how upsetting it is to experience doubts (or anger) about your experience. Time does not heal this wound until you first remove the splinter, which takes more time and effort than you may realize. So, unless you have already put in that time and effort, don't be surprised if you are deeply affected long after the experience. But there is good news! You're NOT an enemy of God for doubting or for failing to meet the requirements of a human organization. An organization that lies cannot be the exclusive spokesman for the God of Truth. Tell me where you're at. I'll understand. I can show you how to begin or continue your recovery and make a life for yourself worth living.
Non-Witnesses: Describe your experience with your friend/relative who is (becoming) a Witness. I can help you understand the Witness indoctrination and social dynamics that are affecting him or her. I can help you put your options into perspective. Keep in mind that people do make their own choices (even though they may sometimes do so under outside influence) and you may not be able to affect this person's choices, even though they impact on you. After all, you do not have the arsenal of tactics that a cult does (and wouldn't want to). A few people manage to save their friend/relative, but don't count on it. What you can count on is navigating the maze more successfully by becoming more informed about your own options.
Experience
I was a Witness for 30 years, and a volunteer at their headquarters in Brooklyn, New York, for a year. I have attended meetings with many Witness congregations across the United States, a thorough cross-section, carefully observing patterns of behavior. Although being a Witness was difficult, and I gradually had more and more doubts about Witness teachings--I was a true believer, so I kept trying to make it work somehow. I stopped attending meetings in 1997 only after receiving an answer to a prayer about doing so, and have since been actively involved in recovery. This includes both my own and supporting others in theirs. Recovery can include reading books, communicating with others in recovery, and participating in support groups and/or therapy. It always involves reclaiming one's own mind and discovering the other sides of the issues that you have been blinded to in the past.
My gradual awakening was socially, psychologically, and spiritually tumultuous. I lost everything from my former life. My suffering was substantial.
But I have gained everything, so it was worth it. Only after beginning my recovery did I gain social, psychological, and spiritual healing and growth, peace of mind, and self-respect. Only then did I discover who I am; and--for the first time--the meaning of real brotherly love.
For more resources on this topic, try these web sites:
http://freeminds.org/
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/freedomofmind/
Education/Credentials
Like most Cult Recovery Counselors, I am a cult survivor. I have life experience, not professional training. Also I feel no need to apologize for that. People with professional training cannot understand what it is like to survive a cult unless they have been through it themselves, which few professional therapists have. Understanding what really happened and what works in this unusual social context is as important as psychological training. Most professional therapists are not specifically trained to support cult survivors. Those who are represent a rare and precious resource.
I sometimes refer people to professional therapists regarding deep personal issues. But surviving a cult is a broad experience with other dimensions. Professional therapy can be very helpful as part of your recovery process, assuming that you choose the right therapist. When choosing a therapist, remember that you are the client and they are a service provider. You are the one who holds authority about the relationship. You get to interview the therapist and decide which one to employ.
Be sure to ask what specific training and experience they have around recovery from cult mind control. Most therapists do not have relevant training. Some carry serious misunderstandings about what cult mind control is; and therefore will misunderstand your struggle. So it pays to be selective as a consumer of professional therapy services.
Past/Present Clients
The Witness organization is not like other churches. Most non-Witnesses really cannot imagine what it is like to be a Witness. The organization has unimaginably extensive rules and monitoring that affect every aspect of life, so there is no privacy and no sense of personal independence. "Independent thought" is considered their greatest "sin".
The organization insists on absolute conformity, and claims to directly represent God; so dissent is not tolerated, and authority is totalitarian. Being a Witness is more like living in China or the former Soviet Union than being a member of a religion as you know it. It was the research of Robert J. Lifton, who was studying--not religions--but totalitarian governments, who first began to illuminate the problem of religious cults around the world, which employ exactly the same tactics as totalitarian governments. His work remains a cornerstone for Cult Recovery Counselors still today. (This may be why many governments are tolerant of cults, to avoid exposing their own control tactics.)
Witnesses often experience unusually dysfunctional lives and an extensive array of personal problems stemming from broken family ties, stunted social development, inner unrest resulting from repressed doubts, inability to defend boundaries, and an extreme, persistent feeling of irrational shame. I can help people impacted by an experience with the Witnesses by revealing in detail the policies and social dynamics in the Witness organization that cause these problems.
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