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| Subject | Date Asked | Expert |
| Sister in law | 9/9/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: My brother in law does attend meetings with her and the kids. She has never tried to push her ... A: I know how frustrating these dynamics can be when you see them from above. Ultimately, people make ... | ||
| Another Family Twisted by JW's | 9/8/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: I read the question and answer regarding what Jw are taught regarding family members who are not JW. ... A: so that others can benefit from your experience. I'm so sorry to hear a siren has captured your ... | ||
| holy spirit | 9/4/2011 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: BASE ON THE BIBLE; NOT THE WATCHTOWER; WE ARE GUIDED BY THE HOLY SPIRIT; Romans 8:14; Luke 1: 79; ... A: The Jehovah's WItnesses believe that the Watchtower organisation is Gods only true organisation on ... | ||
| Witness Conditioning & Family Division | 8/12/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: Why is it that you have to part from your family if you are a Jehovah witness and they aren't? i am ... A: There are no questions that start out with "you are wrong" as your subject line read. So it is not ... | ||
| Freedom of Mind | 6/25/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: We are looking at the faults of Watchtower . Go look at all the other big name churches , ... A: You seem to be interested in theological debate. I am not, so I cannot join you in a verbal tussle ... | ||
| Persistent Jehovah's Witnesses | 6/21/2011 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: Cook, I have a concern about Jehovah's Witnesses. They go to everyone's house, asking them to either ... A: Calling house to house is the JWs way to preach their beliefs, and get people to join them. They ... | ||
| Freedom of Mind | 6/20/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: We are looking at the faults of Watchtower . Go look at all the other big name churches , ... A: You are using a deceptive tactic. You are suggesting that since all churches "fall short" why should ... | ||
| Instability, Govt, Religion, Entrapment | 6/14/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: Yes, Hi. I was just wondering if you know why this world is in such dire conditions right now, and ... A: There's nothing wrong with being worried. Anyone who's truly conscious would be. Some or all of your ... | ||
| plausible deniability | 4/21/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: My longterm friend just did end the friendship and at least using your advice I was more prepared to ... A: I'm sorry this has been emotionally trying for you. You did nothing to deserve this. Jehovah's ... | ||
| The Value of Critical Thinking | 4/1/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: I read your profile a bit. I am an Ex-Jehova's Witness as far as the religion or their book goes, ... A: You may have read some parts of my profile and recent answers that advocates clear reasoning and ... | ||
| MUST READ: ABOUT HONESTY HERE | 3/30/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: I am greatly annoyed by several JW "experts" on this site. They seem to be purposely manipulating ... A: You are astute and correct in your assessment that persons claiming to be experts on the topic of ... | ||
| Jehovah Witnesses | 2/9/2011 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: Got your last reply. I couldn't reply to the last email you sent me. All that you say is true...I ... A: Having spent many years attending JW conventions, a Christian one is VERY different. For a start no ... | ||
| Jehovah Witnesses | 2/8/2011 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: Got your last reply. I couldn't reply to the last email you sent me. All that you say is true...I ... A: I'm quite sure that the Convention I attended was different to the JW one. As you say the JW ... | ||
| Jehovah Witnesses | 2/1/2011 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: Got your last reply. I couldn't reply to the last email you sent me. All that you say is true...I ... A: Sorry not replied sooner have been away. I was at a Christian convention, were I gave a talk on the ... | ||
| Jehovah Witnesses | 1/26/2011 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: I currently study with the Jehovah Witnesses...love it, love them. They are nice folks. Many of the ... A: You are right in saying that JWs will not answer certain question or think about some things because ... | ||
| Jehovah Witnesses | 1/25/2011 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: I currently study with the Jehovah Witnesses...love it, love them. They are nice folks. Many of the ... A: It is obvious that the reply you got was from a JW. There is NO evidence in scripture that Jesus is ... | ||
| Jehovah Witnesses | 1/24/2011 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: I currently study with the Jehovah Witnesses...love it, love them. They are nice folks. Many of the ... A: Is Jesus Really Michael the Archangel? The Watchtower assertion: Jesus was, in his pre-human ... | ||
| How to Disentangle When Only Partially Indoctrinated | 1/20/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: I guess we emailed too much so I had to ask a new question. Thx for your honesty. What I really ... A: Yes, the Witnesses are so focused being part of the "chosen" crowd, and staying part of that crowd, ... | ||
| How to Disentangle When Only Partially Indoctrinated | 1/19/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: I guess we emailed too much so I had to ask a new question. Thx for your honesty. What I really ... A: You mention the trinity, as a point in common with the Witnesses. I share some beliefs in common ... | ||
| How to Disentangle When Only Partially Indoctrinated | 1/19/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: I guess we emailed too much so I had to ask a new question. Thx for your honesty. What I really ... A: I understand it's been pleasant. But there are lots of other churches and chapels out there that ... | ||
| Legitimate Reservations of a Recruit | 1/19/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: I also sent a ? to Brenda. What I mentioned was that in Luke 2:21 it states (or part of it) Jesus ... A: I'm so glad you feel better. There's one important misconception, though, that I feel you need ... | ||
| Legitimate Reservations of a Recruit | 1/19/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: I also sent a ? to Brenda. What I mentioned was that in Luke 2:21 it states (or part of it) Jesus ... A: No need for apologies. All is well. I'm glad you still have your mom and friends. Since it's quite ... | ||
| Legitimate Reservations of a Recruit | 1/19/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: I also sent a ? to Brenda. What I mentioned was that in Luke 2:21 it states (or part of it) Jesus ... A: I don't discuss theological questions, as it belongs to each individual to discover his own ... | ||
| plausible deniability | 1/6/2011 | Andrew |
| Q: I have a longtime friend that converted to the Witnesses. When this friend first converted, they ... A: You are aware of the term "plausible deniability"? You may have heard this term in movies about ... | ||
| JW Girl Hid Her Religion | 12/1/2010 | Andrew |
| Q: This year I learned that my girlfriend of 2 years has been a Jehovah's witness for 4 years. We've ... A: Hab, Thank you for making your question public so others can benefit from your situation. I'm ... | ||
| Dropping her friends for her New JW Man | 11/13/2010 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: A dear friend of 5 years began dating a JW man a little over a year ago. She had mentioned a time ... A: It seems that your friend for the 5 years you have known her, may have been fairly lax in being a ... | ||
| APOSTATE | 10/22/2010 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: Exwitness or not your a liar. Your as bad as Satan himself. You and your God Satan both know exactly ... A: This is a typical answer from a mind-controlled JW moron. You give nothing contructive on why you ... | ||
| Maliciously Toying with Relatives? | 10/5/2010 | Andrew |
| Q: My brother, who has always been a bit on the manipulative/unstable side, has been involved in the ... A: There are certain acts of intervention that have limited success in some cases, where the ... | ||
| I am a non religious person dating a JW. | 9/18/2010 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: My boyfriend is a JW and I'm not. His whole family practices that religion and they seem very devout ... A: This is about the 3-4th question dealing with this subject that I have recently had. You boyfriend ... | ||
| Witness Information Control | 9/17/2010 | Andrew |
| Q: Maybe you can shed some light on this subject. I recently sent a response to Ms. Brenda Martin (Jw ... A: Yes you're quite right. Jehovah's Witnesses practice milieu control and information control. All ... | ||
| my boyfriends a jehovah witness and im a christian | 8/8/2010 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: my boyfriend is a Jehovah witness and his whole family a Jehovah witness and I'm a Christian and my ... A: Firstly let me say that this is a common problem, with a JW and a non-JW. Also I'm surprised that he ... | ||
| Hey Judas! | 8/2/2010 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: Hey Judas! How are you doing? Having fun stabbing the Christ in the back you Coward? "We have ... A: Where you born an idiot or did you take lessons to be one? As a Christian I can see that you have ... | ||
| Awake article on converted Jew | 8/1/2010 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: I thought I might have a better chance getting this published here on critics rather than the other ... A: This is an example how the Watchtower will twist things, to suit their own ends. Facts have never ... | ||
| A Tale of Two Cults | 7/31/2010 | Andrew |
| Q: I am a Christian woman. I am divorced with 2 young boys. I began dating a witness about 6 months ... A: It is unsurprising to me that your fiance would "hold out hope" that you would some day become a ... | ||
| honoring Jehovah | 7/31/2010 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: could you please tell me how best to honor Jehovah the watchtower way A: I would NOT recommend honoring Jehovah the Watchtower way. The Watchtower is a man-made false ... | ||
| Having Escaped a Bullet, Yet in Pain | 7/22/2010 | Andrew |
| Q: I love the way that you write...this is the first information that I have read that really helps me ... A: I'm glad my column has given you clarity on a difficult and cloudy issue. As you may or may not ... | ||
| Reclaiming one's mind without losing family | 7/7/2010 | Andrew |
| Q: I was introduced to JW's at the age of 8, and accepted the religion, while my parents joined several ... A: You didn't mention your current age or living arrangements. If you decide to write a follow-up ... | ||
| Extreme Frivolous Control | 6/26/2010 | Andrew |
| Q: Is it appropriate for on of Jehovah's Witnesses to work for a greeting card company such as Hallmark ... A: My area of expertise is to uncover the tactics used by Jehovah's Witnesses and other cults to impair ... | ||
| Civil liberties as a result of Jehovah's Witnesses | 6/16/2010 | Gordon Cook |
| Q: I would like to know what civil liberties others enjoy as a result of what Jehovah's Witnesses have ... A: The Watchtower Society is proud of its extensive use of the world's court systems, claiming it has ... | ||
| Evidence as a Basis for Reasoning | 5/31/2010 | Andrew |
| Q: I am back with the Jehovah's witness girl I already mentioned a couple of weeks ago. Everything ... A: If there were a psychoactive agent in the baptismal water used by Witnesses, it would be effective ... | ||
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Top Expert on this page
I don't object to Witness theology, but rather their use of social pressure & deceptive manipulations to undermine family ties and control minds. (This may seem contradictory to Witnesses, who draw no distinction between spiritual belief and organizational policy.) I do not engage in theological debate. I support persons impacted by an experience with the Witnesses and advocate early education for everyone so that they can protect themselves from cults by understanding what to watch out for. (It's not what most people think.)
(Ex-)Witnesses: I know how upsetting it is to experience doubts (or anger) about your experience. Time does not heal this wound until you first remove the splinter, which takes more time and effort than you may realize. So, unless you have already put in that time and effort, don't be surprised if you are deeply affected long after the experience. But there is good news! You're NOT an enemy of God for doubting or for failing to meet the requirements of a human organization. An organization that lies cannot be the exclusive spokesman for the God of Truth. Tell me where you're at. I'll understand. I can show you how to begin or continue your recovery and make a life for yourself worth living.
Non-Witnesses: Describe your experience with your friend/relative who is (becoming) a Witness. I can help you understand the Witness indoctrination and social dynamics that are affecting him or her. I can help you put your options into perspective. Keep in mind that people do make their own choices (even though they may sometimes do so under outside influence) and you may not be able to affect this person's choices, even though they impact on you. After all, you do not have the arsenal of tactics that a cult does (and wouldn't want to). A few people manage to save their friend/relative, but don't count on it. What you can count on is navigating the maze more successfully by becoming more informed about your own options.
I was a Witness for 30 years, and a volunteer at their headquarters in Brooklyn, New York, for a year. I have attended meetings with many Witness congregations across the United States, a thorough cross-section, carefully observing patterns of behavior. Although being a Witness was difficult, and I gradually had more and more doubts about Witness teachings--I was a true believer, so I kept trying to make it work somehow. I stopped attending meetings in 1997 only after receiving an answer to a prayer about doing so, and have since been actively involved in recovery. This includes both my own and supporting others in theirs. Recovery can include reading books, communicating with others in recovery, and participating in support groups and/or therapy. It always involves reclaiming one's own mind and discovering the other sides of the issues that you have been blinded to in the past.
My gradual awakening was socially, psychologically, and spiritually tumultuous. I lost everything from my former life. My suffering was substantial.
But I have gained everything, so it was worth it. Only after beginning my recovery did I gain social, psychological, and spiritual healing and growth, peace of mind, and self-respect. Only then did I discover who I am; and--for the first time--the meaning of real brotherly love.
For more resources on this topic, try these web sites:
http://freeminds.org/
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/freedomofmind/
Education/Credentials
Like most Cult Recovery Counselors, I am a cult survivor. I have life experience, not professional training. Also I feel no need to apologize for that. People with professional training cannot understand what it is like to survive a cult unless they have been through it themselves, which few professional therapists have. Understanding what really happened and what works in this unusual social context is as important as psychological training. Most professional therapists are not specifically trained to support cult survivors. Those who are represent a rare and precious resource.
I sometimes refer people to professional therapists regarding deep personal issues. But surviving a cult is a broad experience with other dimensions. Professional therapy can be very helpful as part of your recovery process, assuming that you choose the right therapist. When choosing a therapist, remember that you are the client and they are a service provider. You are the one who holds authority about the relationship. You get to interview the therapist and decide which one to employ.
Be sure to ask what specific training and experience they have around recovery from cult mind control. Most therapists do not have relevant training. Some carry serious misunderstandings about what cult mind control is; and therefore will misunderstand your struggle. So it pays to be selective as a consumer of professional therapy services.
Past/Present Clients
The Witness organization is not like other churches. Most non-Witnesses really cannot imagine what it is like to be a Witness. The organization has unimaginably extensive rules and monitoring that affect every aspect of life, so there is no privacy and no sense of personal independence. "Independent thought" is considered their greatest "sin".
The organization insists on absolute conformity, and claims to directly represent God; so dissent is not tolerated, and authority is totalitarian. Being a Witness is more like living in China or the former Soviet Union than being a member of a religion as you know it. It was the research of Robert J. Lifton, who was studying--not religions--but totalitarian governments, who first began to illuminate the problem of religious cults around the world, which employ exactly the same tactics as totalitarian governments. His work remains a cornerstone for Cult Recovery Counselors still today. (This may be why many governments are tolerant of cults, to avoid exposing their own control tactics.)
Witnesses often experience unusually dysfunctional lives and an extensive array of personal problems stemming from broken family ties, stunted social development, inner unrest resulting from repressed doubts, inability to defend boundaries, and an extreme, persistent feeling of irrational shame. I can help people impacted by an experience with the Witnesses by revealing in detail the policies and social dynamics in the Witness organization that cause these problems.

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