| Subject | Date Asked | Expert |
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| infatuation | 11/19/2009 | Lauren Kaufman |
Q: My other half of 18 years is infatuated w/ someone else. He knows the problems with the other person ...
A: the beginning of your paragraph made sense to me, but not the last sentence. Why would you wait for ...
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| Latest events | 11/14/2009 | Lauren Kaufman |
Q: Lauren - Here I am again with an update. I moved into my own place 5 weeks ago. It hasn't been ...
A: His pain is not really your issue. Was he concerned about your hurt, when he vacillated about ...
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| relationship with father of out of control teen boy | 11/10/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: again. You gave some advice earlier that did give me some direction even though you felt maybe it ...
A: Nice to hear from you Renee, thanks for the update. So you've become more and more of the therapist ...
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| Crossing lines | 11/7/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I have a very perplexing question. Why do I have so many married men interested in me, telling me ...
A: First, they are separate problems -- I'm pretty sure of that -- so don't conflate them. It will make ...
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| More on dating father of out of control teen boy | 11/3/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: again. You gave some advice earlier that did give me some direction even though you felt maybe it ...
A: I would guess you've convinced your counselors that you want support from them to hang in and they ...
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| The Dream | 11/2/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: Doc I have a dream. A dream that the man I love, who also loves me, will end up together ...
A: No advice yet. What I'd like to do is send you a draft of an early chapter on baggage. It's a way ...
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| Where to now? | 11/1/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: Belove, I am a soon to be 49 year old woman who is in a very confused state of what is next? I ...
A: Anne, I'm sorry this is so hard for you. It's what happens to so many of us. Welcome to your ...
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| Cunfused | 11/1/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I am hoping you can help me understand some things and maybe even put me on a path to make a ...
A: Hard to tell. I like that you have a sense that it might be a dynamic of the relationship. You ...
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| platonic ? | 10/28/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: Have been dating a man for a year now and slept with him a number of times. We get a long great, but ...
A: Joan, my prediction is that it will hurt him to hear this. You probably have to say it anyway. It ...
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| Communication issues | 10/28/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I am a 41 year old widowed mother of two daughters, 14 and 11. I have been dating my boyfriend for ...
A: Sounds pretty bad and also sounds like you've waited a bit too long. Often in a relationship when ...
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| Dating father of out of control teen boy | 10/16/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I'm 43. The man I've been dating, Tony, is 40 and we have been very serious for the past eleven ...
A: I'm so sorry to hear all this. It's quite sad. The story? Well, it just sounds like more of the ...
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| Latest chapter in my crazy drama | 10/8/2009 | Lauren Kaufman |
Q: Lauren - The movers are coming tomorrow and there are packed boxes everywhere you look. So last ...
A: He is losing the control battle and his ability to call the shots. You are deciding what will happen ...
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| Co-worker crush | 10/8/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I am in need of some advice regarding a situation that I believe amounts to a “crush” involving a ...
A: She's flirting with you and she knows it. She's going to take her time. I hope you can stand it. ...
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| Dating father of out of control teen boy | 10/6/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I'm 43. The man I've been dating, Tony, is 40 and we have been very serious for the past eleven ...
A: Nice to hear back from you and I'm glad my answer was moderately helpful. It does not sound like ...
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| Dating father of out of control teen boy | 10/5/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I'm 43. The man I've been dating, Tony, is 40 and we have been very serious for the past eleven ...
A: Renee, you better pray. It's going to take a miracle. When a teenager is that out of control it ...
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| update | 10/4/2009 | Lauren Kaufman |
Q: Lauren - I'm the woman who wrote to you a couple weeks ago about pulling the plug on the guy ...
A: I want to commend you on making the hard decision to move out. You're showing him that you can live ...
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| Starting over? | 10/3/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: Dr. Belove, thanks for the opportunity to ask a question. I may be posing it on the wrong site, ...
A: It does create a huge emptiness when they finally back off from you and create their own life. It's ...
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| Trying to change me | 10/3/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: Belove, I have been in relationships over the past years that while the men were incredible when ...
A: What you do know is that they are real honest to goodness red flags and they are all over the place ...
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| question | 9/29/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I've dated several men throughout my life and had mainly positive experiences with each one. I have ...
A: I'd be curious about what the psychiatrists and counselors said to you before advising you. I'll go ...
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| Is it me? | 9/28/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: Belove, Thanks for the opportunity to ask a question of you. I am mid 40s and been divorced for ...
A: You've asked good, solid, deep questions. And also, being in your mid 40's, that's about the time ...
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| How much do I reveal? | 9/24/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I was separated for over three years and finally divorced about 18 months ago, ending an emotionally ...
A: I like to think I'm an intuitive guy, too. Lovely, lovely question. Well, of course, you have ...
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| Dealing with boyfriends ex-wife | 9/20/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: My boyfriend of 1 year was married for 10 years, and divorced for 8. They have no kids, no alimony ...
A: Your letter is a little hard to follow. First you say they have no kids and then you say "he did ...
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| How do I break up with my live-in boyfriend? | 9/17/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I've been dating my boyfriend for nearly two years now. At first, things were great, as one would ...
A: If you've ever flown you'll remember the safety announcement. "If there is an emergency and the ...
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| I think it's over | 9/16/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: Philip - I just wrote to you about a week ago with details about my fiancee who just couldn't ...
A: That's a bit better. I gave you a challenge and you stepped right up to it. So it sounds like you ...
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| I think it's over | 9/16/2009 | Lauren Kaufman |
Q: Lauren - I just wrote to you about a week ago with details about my fiancee who just couldn't ...
A: sorry to hear that things haven't changed for the better. I think a person knows when they have had ...
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| I think it's over | 9/16/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: Philip - I just wrote to you about a week ago with details about my fiancee who just couldn't ...
A: I've seen this happen often enough. Usually the plug has to be pulled. At the very least you have to ...
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| advice | 9/15/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I have two questions rolled into one. It's both a dating and career question. I'm a 32 year old ...
A: Again, thanks for the follow up. I don't think it would be appropriate for him to follow up ...
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| advice | 9/15/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I have two questions rolled into one. It's both a dating and career question. I'm a 32 year old ...
A: Delicate. You have to decide whether or not to write off the job before you try the personal ...
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| Dating with Children at 20 Miles | 9/14/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I met a man in 6 months ago who is absolutely wonderful. We get along in almost every sense. In ...
A: It's hard to identify your concerns. They seem to be a bit tangled. Maybe this is an accurate ...
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| boyfriend isn't interested in being a parent | 9/8/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I have been dating the same man for nearly three years. I began seeing him when I was still married ...
A: You're doing what you have to do. Such decisions are painful and take time. You've emphasized that ...
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| Feelings for an ex | 9/7/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I have been dating a woman for the past 2 years. Just to give you some background on her. She is ...
A: This is a strange story you've told and I, like you, have more questions than answers. I suppose I ...
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| What to do?? | 9/4/2009 | Lauren Kaufman |
Q: Lauren - I am 60, divorced for 11 years, engaged since July to a man who is 61, divorced for 4 ...
A: What I was talking about was his control issues in disguise. The reason I say this is because when a ...
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| What to do?? | 9/3/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: Philip - I am 60, divorced for 11 years, engaged since July to a man who is 61, divorced for 4 ...
A: Interesting feedback. In your first letter, as you told the story, it was all about how indecisive ...
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| What to do?? | 9/3/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: Philip - I am 60, divorced for 11 years, engaged since July to a man who is 61, divorced for 4 ...
A: There are elements to it that are quite sweet. Your loyalty to him, your patience with him, his love ...
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| What to do?? | 9/3/2009 | Lauren Kaufman |
Q: Lauren - I am 60, divorced for 11 years, engaged since July to a man who is 61, divorced for 4 ...
A: ...I am almost laughing except I know your frustration. First, let me say what you're explaining to ...
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| Dont have any Fiancee | 9/3/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I do not have any Fiancee .I have no idea what goes wrong. i do not find any girl or the girls do ...
A: I could help you, But you would have to tell me so much more. I'd need specifics. However, to ...
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| break up or not | 8/29/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I'm 53, college educated, divorced, have 2 kids and a professional job. After dating a lot in the ...
A: You have many good reasons for your misgivings. Give your intuition a gold star and take them ...
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| Dating a Widow | 8/27/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I am 63 years old and have had several dates with a recently widowed (9 months)59 year old woman. We ...
A: It's not a bad idea to take her at her word. At least start there. She says she just wants to have ...
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| how do i get him | 8/26/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I really like this guy...but he has a steady girlfriend that he has been dating for a year. The girl ...
A: What you are doing is called "mate poaching." Sometimes it works. However, there is a price to pay. ...
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| Question on Partner/Boyfriend | 8/22/2009 | Philip Belove, Ed.D. |
Q: I met a wonderful guy online (e-harmony) about five months ago. It basically was the first date ...
A: First some general comments. I haven't read the Talisman and Cutright work. It's possible that ...
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