About Christopher Pinhey, PhD Expertise Anything about middle-aged dating. I just co-wrote a book on it called "M.A.D. -- Your Guide to Middle-Aged Dating"
Experience I am a clinical psychologist in private practice, have been a consulting psychologist for Canyon Ranch Resort in Tucson and have counseled patients for over 30 years. Also, I just got divorced after 25 years so that experience led me to writing the book from both a personal and professional perspective.
Organizations Southern Arizona Psychological Association (I'm currently treasurer).
Publications Book will be available on Amazon.com shortly. Currently available on the www.middleageddating.com Web site.
Education/Credentials PhD in Clinical Psychology. B.A. in Sociology.
Expert: Christopher Pinhey, PhD Date: 5/25/2008 Subject: dating
Question Why is it that when a man puts his arms around a woman, it is the BEST feeling in the world? This has nothing to do with who the guy is. It could be a boyfriend/husband, or it could be just any guy, brother, friend, father etc. Even lesbians have told me that when a man holds them they feel awesome. What is it about women that crave this feeling?
Second question -
I am a 26 year old woman. I like a guy who is 39 years old and he seems to like me a lot. We are both in medical school together and we are both going to become doctors. He was in the army for 10 years prior to coming to med school. he has been through A LOT in the army.
He seems lonely and kind of horny too. But I can tell he's basically a good guy and has been hurt by women in the past so I'm willing to give him a chance. I like him a lot.
Despite his age, experience, and his good looks, he seems very simple and also seems to have no clue as to how to move things forward with a woman. I find this odd considering how many long term girlfriends he's had.
Ok so what can you tell me. I've never dated a guy older than me, all the guys I've dated are young 19-24 range.
So maybe it will be nice to date a real man for a change ... instead of training a boy... or changing diapers (just kidding)
Can you tell me any problems you see with our age difference?
He's almost 15 years my senior
thanks
~ jaci ~
Answer Dear Jaci, Isn't it interesting that we so often find older men dating younger women rather than the other way around? It just may have something to do with the biological imperative (the aforementioned "horniness"). The main problem I note from what you wrote is that this older, experienced (or so we think) man may not be very accomplished in relating with women. Age, and even experience, does not necessarily make one a good partner. As to the age difference itself, it's just one more gap to bridge. I tell the couples that I see for counseling that the first gap to bridge is the male-female one. But the more gaps there are, the better the communication needs to be. In the age category, there will not be as many shared experiences as with someone who is more age appropriate. Finally, hugs are indeed, great. I have found that the bigger the person, the more potential for a better hug. Ergo, men are usually bigger, so hugs from men are also better. Chris
