Dating at Midlife/I am happy


my extremely good friend, i feel happy. At last I discovered everything was happening to me:
I fell in love with the last girl because  several months ago I had been chatting with her by facebook and later I kissed her and enjoined it a lot. I fell in love just that. The problem came when I was chating with her by SMS mobile phone and I think she was fooling me around. Pulling my leg. So I fall into depression..more that 18 months suffering, taking pills, and no having sex at all.I feel good because I did insight. I have being thinking about call her up, and explain what happened, but I am afraid to fall into depression again. What do you think about it?
plenty of thanks for your kind help, It is a pyty I can not help you from this land...first chavez and now maduro.

I think you are still in your
craziness.  It cycles. The happiness is as a unrealistic as the sadness.
Underneath there is a deeper truth.
But you have to really want to know it.
And you have to understand that you are strong enough to handle it...
There are gifts waiting for you
great rewards,
but you will have to face your dragons.

Sex, girlfriends, kisses, are all half-truths.

I hope you find someone who can help you.

I am perhaps too difficult to schedule time with,
or our language barriar is too difficult

I don't know
I want you to succeed. I know that.


Dating at Midlife

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Philip Belove, Ed.D.


Hi. I`m Philip Belove (that is my name, really). I`m 71 and I`ve been a psychologist all my midlife, the past 35 years. My specialty has been counseling and coaching other midlife adults.  I think we all figure things out as we go along, but even more so at midlife. Being between 40-ish and 60-ish and single is like being a stranger in a strange land. I`ve learned which questions help people find their own way. I created this category, I publish a blog at and I write articles for various web sites. My commitment is to help people 1) understand and improve how they deal with others, 2) understand the forces that rule the relationships they are in, and 3) make the decisions which will shape, or create, or end those relationships  so they achieve the goal of midlife development  to finally live with personal satisfaction. I`ve been divorced twice myself. I`m in a satisfying relationship with a fine person. I`m very interested in learning about your challenges and in offering what I can.


Professionally: Licensed Psychologist. Marriage and Family Therapist. Coach.Author. University Lecturer. Personally: I'm 71. I've probably made all the big mistakes, er, learned the big lessons.I've forgiven myself and made many apologies and I've made it into a good, stable, sweet relationship. I now have a perspective on midlife.

Please check out my book, Rabbis in Love, at Also my blog at The Rabbi book was done as part of a research project. My collaborator, Marilyn Bronstein, and I wanted to interview couples with very successful marriage and also we wanted to talk to people who cared as much about their spirituality as love. Maybe being able to love and be spiritual were one and same, we thought. So we found a rabbi couple and the interview was so astounding that we interviewed nine more rabbi couples. One dropped. They'd revealed too much. It's a fascinating book and, Jewish or not, religious or not, these couples do a lot of things right and there is a lot to learn from them.

Masters in Counseling Psychology, Alfred Adler Institute Doctorate in Consulting Psychology, focus on family therapy, University of Massachusetts at Amherst

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