You are here:
| Subject | Date Asked |
| dating in midlife | 2/5/2012 |
| Q: I am 49 y.o, divorced, living with 54 y.o male who has been separated for a bit more then 3 years. ... A: Your letter states that he is very very sincere about NOT GETTING MARRIED. This must be taken at ... | |
| ayuda | 11/30/2011 |
| Q: 7 years ago I had a relationship with a goldigger, then I was 41 and she 35 once I discovered she ... A: You seem to have difficulty in finding good relationships and the reason could be, is that you don't ... | |
| Realtionship disaster | 10/7/2011 |
| Q: This may be a tad long. I am in a 4 year relationship with my live in boyfriend. We love each other ... A: I hear such confusion from you and it's imperative that you gain clarity for your self. First it's ... | |
| Old high school boyfriend. | 9/8/2011 |
| Q: I received an email from an old boyfriend from high school. We are both 50. He is just getting to ... A: I'm so sorry that you're going through this. Let's break this down. First, The GOOD news! I'm the ... | |
| move on? | 9/4/2011 |
| Q: I've gone on a few dates with a nice gentleman. We were supposed to go on a date on Friday. Friday ... A: With just a few dates under your belt, why would you stop dating? He never promised you a commitment ... | |
| why DID he call me back? | 8/21/2011 |
| Q: serious guy. He is a corporate tax attorney and never smiles. His whole life has been book work and ... A: I love, love, love your spirit g/f. You INTRIGUED him. He got the unexpected. I think it's ... | |
| dating sites | 6/10/2011 |
| Q: i find nearly all dating sites spammers porn or worse why is this apart from the obvious theres no ... A: The answer to this question is a multi level answer. Firstly, the government yours and mine have ... | |
| Disappears and then rambles about marriage? | 4/26/2011 |
| Q: I went on a date with a very pleasant gentleman who was extremely shy but sweet and honest. Kind and ... A: I think communication is everything. Ask him about why you haven't heard from him in his 2 month ... | |
| Socio-economic class difference? | 4/24/2011 |
| Q: I've met a very kind, polite, generous, sweet, intelligent, handsome man who works as in investment ... A: there are many successful couples that are very different in many ways. Each person brings to the ... | |
| what happened? | 4/6/2011 |
| Q: I'm a doctor and I recently met a man online who was a lawyer. He was very handsome and smart and ... A: You didn't mention what state you reside in, but I think you could access the same information all ... | |
| question | 3/29/2011 |
| Q: Can I ask your opinion on this. From what you have seen throughout your dating experience. Ok let's ... A: Throughout my knowledge of dating, it would be improbable in my opinion, that a man would call after ... | |
| update | 3/5/2011 |
| Q: Lauren - Remember me? I'm the one with the on-again off-again boyfriend whose MO was to cut off ... A: I don't remember if we touched on the narcissist profile, but if not, it might help to read a little ... | |
| Friends with ex- possible? | 1/25/2011 |
| Q: My relationship with ex- was full of chaos and drama plus sexually intense. There was also recovery ... A: Okay Gotcha! I understand better now, but my response is still the same. He obviously isn't jumping ... | |
| Friends with ex- possible? | 1/25/2011 |
| Q: My relationship with ex- was full of chaos and drama plus sexually intense. There was also recovery ... A: I'm very confused by your letter because it's contradictory. Needy people usually cling to people, ... | |
| friends but possibly more | 1/21/2011 |
| Q: I have a really good friend who I know finds me attractive yet he only wants to be friends with me. ... A: there are situations in life we know we have no control over. When we try to control situations our ... | |
| interferring relatives | 12/29/2010 |
| Q: This summer I met a wonderful man on the internet. He read my facebook profile and contacted me. ... A: If you allow them to intimidate you, they will feel like they are winning. I would limit my time or ... | |
| interferring relatives | 12/29/2010 |
| Q: This summer I met a wonderful man on the internet. He read my facebook profile and contacted me. ... A: Ahhhhhhh, the art of blended families. You're tackling some of the most difficult problems that ... | |
| stages of development | 11/26/2010 |
| Q: General question, from what you've seen in life. Where would an 18 year old girl (woman) be in her ... A: Wow....what a great mature question. Since maturity, family circumstance, financial circumstance and ... | |
| bully laughing and jeering? | 11/13/2010 |
| Q: I was violently bullied at the workplace by another coworker. I reported her anonymously and she got ... A: It's against the law for anyone to put their hands on you, so it would have been perfectly ... | |
| bully laughing and jeering? | 11/12/2010 |
| Q: I was violently bullied at the workplace by another coworker. I reported her anonymously and she got ... A: I try to do things that get win/win results. If it were me I would have gone directly to the bully ... | |
| never thought this would happen | 11/8/2010 |
| Q: I met a guy at my work in this tiny office building. We only work there 1-2 days a week, for 4 hour ... A: I have a couple of thoughts on this. With a reality check. First thought that immediately came into ... | |
| cold feet | 10/8/2010 |
| Q: Lauren - I don’t know whether you will remember my story. I wrote to you a year ago about my ... A: don't be discouraged. This push and pull thing may go on for quite awhile. That's because they know ... | |
| cold feet | 10/8/2010 |
| Q: Lauren - I don’t know whether you will remember my story. I wrote to you a year ago about my ... A: yes I do remember your letter and the issues surrounding your relationship. This is all about you, ... | |
| is there a future in this relationship? | 9/23/2010 |
| Q: I am 50 years old and a friend (50 also) reconnected last year after about 40 years. He and I were ... A: Hmmmmmm, I'm not so sure that you're really thinking what he's thinking. According to your first ... | |
| interest after rejection? | 8/14/2010 |
| Q: I asked a guy out for coffee at this business expo thing, and he said no, that he had a girlfriend. ... A: First, let me apologize, I thought I answered and sent this question weeks ago. Guys are very ... | |
| reuniting with former date | 7/27/2010 |
| Q: I'm a 45-year-old woman. I've been divorced for 4 years now and am having a difficult time dating. 2 ... A: it's very hard to meet someone that you feel that "attraction" to. Our chemistry senses are willing ... | |
| Ex-Wife Blues | 7/5/2010 |
| Q: My live in boyfriend's ex-wife left him 3 years ago. One year before that while living in the same ... A: I can hear your frustration and completely agree with how you feel. The problem is that you ... | |
| sex | 7/5/2010 |
| Q: how is it that women can give up sex and men cant;why? and how do women give up sex ANSWER: I ... A: Maybe you should eliminate the word sex from loving. There are other ways for you as a man to ... | |
| sex | 7/5/2010 |
| Q: how is it that women can give up sex and men cant;why? and how do women give up sex ANSWER: I ... A: Hmmmmmm..........I'm not sure if that's true either. But.......women want MORE than just sex and ... | |
| sex | 7/1/2010 |
| Q: how is it that women can give up sex and men cant;why? and how do women give up sex A: I don't think women give up sex. There are many reasons why women lose interest in sex, but they ... | |
| Why does he just want to be friends? | 6/1/2010 |
| Q: He says I am "charming and adorable" and our chemistry and attraction is constant, yet he wants to ... A: He may be feeling gun shy because of his losses. That doesn't explain why he wouldn't want someone ... | |
| Why does he just want to be friends? | 6/1/2010 |
| Q: He says I am "charming and adorable" and our chemistry and attraction is constant, yet he wants to ... A: based on your description of him, I doubt if he would allow the relationship to deepen. If you're ... | |
| dating question | 4/9/2010 |
| Q: "Hi, I'm hoping you can help me. I was divorced almost 4 years ago after a 20-year marriage(I ... A: welcome to the club of hurt and confusion. You don't mention your age and that's fine but here lies ... | |
| I trusted him and he lied to me | 4/7/2010 |
| Q: I wrote to you last week about this guy and I having incredible chemistry and attraction, but he was ... A: Tread carefully there. There is a lot of nonsense, liars, and everything else you can think of ... | |
| I trusted him and he lied to me | 4/7/2010 |
| Q: I wrote to you last week about this guy and I having incredible chemistry and attraction, but he was ... A: I would suggest going to the library and start doing research on this. You're definitely on the ... | |
| I trusted him and he lied to me | 4/6/2010 |
| Q: I wrote to you last week about this guy and I having incredible chemistry and attraction, but he was ... A: This is not good. We write our own scripts and we're responsible for the outcome of these scenes. ... | |
| love at 50 years | 4/2/2010 |
| Q: I have incredible chemistry and attraction with a friend. We both feel the same way towards each ... A: Okay......got it. As long as you're not married and you have your head on your shoulders it doesn't ... | |
| love at 50 years | 4/2/2010 |
| Q: I have incredible chemistry and attraction with a friend. We both feel the same way towards each ... A: I appreciate friendship...........they are lifelines of support. However, you haven't given me one ... | |
| lovemaking | 3/23/2010 |
| Q: how do i avoid golddiggers i dont say ive got money? ANSWER: You have to meet women like you're ... A: I don't know why your wife wants you to kiss her but not have intercourse. I would imagine the two ... | |
| lovemaking | 3/23/2010 |
| Q: how do i avoid golddiggers i dont say ive got money? ANSWER: You have to meet women like you're ... A: Jef, you keep going back and forth from dating people to being married. I believe I answered this ... | |
| golddiggers | 3/23/2010 |
| Q: how do i avoid golddiggers i dont say ive got money? A: You have to meet women like you're going on a fact finding mission. Now I'm not saying you have to ... | |
| dating young women | 3/22/2010 |
| Q: why am i attracted to young women to date i know im wasting my time im 57? ANSWER: Hi Jef, I'm not ... A: If young women only want money, and you don't have any money then what time are you wasting? You ... | |
| dating young women | 3/18/2010 |
| Q: why am i attracted to young women to date i know im wasting my time im 57? A: I'm not sure you're wasting your time. I live in an area where men your age date young women ... | |
| players who marry | 3/17/2010 |
| Q: There are many very handsome men who are longtime confirmed bachelors, such as George Clooney, etc. ... A: I have a very different viewpoint of celebrities and men on TV. I don't believe these guys marry ... | |
| dating | 3/15/2010 |
| Q: is it reasonable to experience a loving sexual love in mid life;? i understand that for women after ... A: Because, most people CAN NOT live a lie. If you're an excellent con artist, it may take awhile, but ... | |
| dating | 3/11/2010 |
| Q: is it reasonable to experience a loving sexual love in mid life;? i understand that for women after ... A: I personally could never understand why men stay in relationships they no longer want. Is this a ... | |
| dating | 3/10/2010 |
| Q: is it reasonable to experience a loving sexual love in mid life;? i understand that for women after ... A: I think menopause has it's effects on women for sure, but there are a lot of creative ways to have a ... | |
| party for singles over 50 | 2/4/2010 |
| Q: I want to plan a party for singles 50 and over but I am stuck with what they would like to do and ... A: ...I've gone to some....so maybe I can you help you out. If it's out doors... we had to fill up ... | |
| a lover | 12/29/2009 |
| Q: I am a 44 years old man married with 5 childrem (mexicans) and I knew a girl, perhaps 40 or ... A: I'm not a believer in affairs of the heart. This world has become a society of disposable things and ... | |
| infatuation | 11/19/2009 |
| Q: My other half of 18 years is infatuated w/ someone else. He knows the problems with the other person ... A: the beginning of your paragraph made sense to me, but not the last sentence. Why would you wait for ... | |
| Latest events | 11/14/2009 |
| Q: Lauren - Here I am again with an update. I moved into my own place 5 weeks ago. It hasn't been ... A: His pain is not really your issue. Was he concerned about your hurt, when he vacillated about ... | |
| Latest chapter in my crazy drama | 10/8/2009 |
| Q: Lauren - The movers are coming tomorrow and there are packed boxes everywhere you look. So last ... A: He is losing the control battle and his ability to call the shots. You are deciding what will happen ... | |
| update | 10/4/2009 |
| Q: Lauren - I'm the woman who wrote to you a couple weeks ago about pulling the plug on the guy ... A: I want to commend you on making the hard decision to move out. You're showing him that you can live ... | |
| I think it's over | 9/16/2009 |
| Q: Lauren - I just wrote to you about a week ago with details about my fiancee who just couldn't ... A: sorry to hear that things haven't changed for the better. I think a person knows when they have had ... | |
| What to do?? | 9/4/2009 |
| Q: Lauren - I am 60, divorced for 11 years, engaged since July to a man who is 61, divorced for 4 ... A: What I was talking about was his control issues in disguise. The reason I say this is because when a ... | |
| What to do?? | 9/3/2009 |
| Q: Lauren - I am 60, divorced for 11 years, engaged since July to a man who is 61, divorced for 4 ... A: ...I am almost laughing except I know your frustration. First, let me say what you're explaining to ... | |
| dating in the workplace | 8/11/2009 |
| Q: So I just started a new job as a host at an upscale restaurant, I am not planning on staying in this ... A: ok ...a few things to consider here. If you choose to go forward with this let's first talk about ... | |
Answers by Expert:
Top Expert on this page
I can answer all questions pertaining to dating, dating at 50+, online dating, health and sexual issues regarding relationships.
I have founded and facilitated Life After Divorce, a support group located in New Jersey. I plan to open another one in Florida.
You can also visit my blog
http://isdivorce4u.blogspot.com/
Education/Credentials
I have been a life coach as well as a divorce expert on allexperts.com for over 10 years.

©2012 About.com, a part of The New York Times Company. All rights reserved.