About Jenny Expertise I can answer questions about how to deal with a cheating boyfriend/husband. Questions about the anxiety of always wanting to know what your man is doing. I can give expert advice as to why is your bf/gf acting the way they're acting. Basically I can answer anything that has to deal with Jealousy and Control issues.
Experience I've had many real-life experiences in which I can relate to the writer. I took a few Psychology classes back in 2007 and I'm dealing with the subject.
Organizations Grand Beacon Center; Coaching young adults with life experiences.
Education/Credentials High School Diploma
Currently enrolled in the Medical field in college.
Justin wrote at 2008-08-24 18:07:06
I understand what you are going through and feel the same pain. My fiance lost hers to her past boyfriend and it really hurts. The same situation, she only had sex with one other person, but I understand that feeling of being robbed of something that I've always expected to share with my wife. I also understand the other side of the argument, that you get so much else by marrying her. But the honest truth is, if this is something that really matters to you maybe you need to take some time apart and decide if being with someone else who is still a virgin is worth more than being with your current fiance. Good luck with this dilemma, it is a tough one that many guys deal with in silence because it seems it is not acceptable anymore to want/expect a virgin wife.
John C. wrote at 2009-02-09 22:38:34
Christian,
I completely understand where you are coming from with this. I have been married for 9 years and my scenario is almost identical to yours! I continue to struggle through it however my wife gets frustrated that I still think about it.She says it meant nothing and she cried after because she was ashamed of herself etc... I think all of this is due to our societal beliefs!!! Men are shamed if they don't lose their virginity by their teens! If girls do that they are instantly "de-flowered" as you say. I really think this is just a double standard and limiting belief that we have been fed since we were young. I know what you mean though and I am in the same boat! The thing that I try to do it just realize that I can imagine every detail and how it played out with her and him. The things that were said and all that stuff. You could go crazy imagining the scenarios!!! All I can say is let it go. Past is past, like it or not there is nothing you can do about what happened to your Fiancee. The only thing you can do now is forgive and forget! I am sure that she will and is doing the same for you. Forgive her. Forgive the tough decision she made just to keep that guy in her life. I am sure she is tortured by the act as well. Just move forward and work on each other and what you have now! That is all you can do or you can choose to let her go because the torture is too much. I am sure the latter is not even an option! :) I hope this helps. Have a great day and God bless!!! :)
