About Jenny Expertise I can answer questions about how to deal with a cheating boyfriend/husband. Questions about the anxiety of always wanting to know what your man is doing. I can give expert advice as to why is your bf/gf acting the way they're acting. Basically I can answer anything that has to deal with Jealousy and Control issues.
Experience I've had many real-life experiences in which I can relate to the writer. I took a few Psychology classes back in 2007 and I'm dealing with the subject.
Organizations Grand Beacon Center; Coaching young adults with life experiences.
Education/Credentials High School Diploma
Currently enrolled in the Medical field in college.
Question To whom this may concern i apologize if this question has been asked to you a thousand times.
Heres the situation and the backstory. I was dating my girl for a year until she broke up with me in April. She left me because we were in a long distance relationship and she was having "family problems". Up until that point she swore to me up and down i was the true love of her life and she loved and all this F'in bs. I believed her but when she left me i got depressed. 1 month later i found out she got with her ex man who had cheated on her. They were together for almost 1 month during which she proceeded to give him her virginity after she had promised me i was going to be her first. She then realized her huge mistake and realize she was in love with me and wanted me back. I took her back and forgave her and believed everything.
Up until now things were running decent until last night she gave me the password of her Myspace. Well what i found was a pandoras box. I found letters she wrote to guys back in may RIGHT AFTER she left her ex... flirting with guys.. accepting their phone #... telling them they were cute and everything.
She even exchanged messages with a guy telling him she was single and that she didnt want a man because she was too much of a flirt.
I confronted her about it last night and today and she tells me that im stupid for thinking that she was serious... and that the guy back in may she never called him and never met him.. that i was convincing myself of lies.
How can i not be jealous ??? please tell me how ??? shes lying to me... i dont know what to do.. im dying inside.
I dont know if some of these guys are just friends who she communicates through myspace with... or if she just harmlessly flirts with them on the net... if i really AM her true love.... what ? what ?!!!
I threw a huge fit and screamed and cursed at her and she broke up with me.
I just cant seem to get over what she did when she left me. I mean i understand that the sex was nothing.. and it meant nothing to her and we werent together... but because of her i have become too insecure in this relationship.
Please help me to deal with my jealousy... please.
I cant live with her or without her.
Thanks in advance.
Answer Hi Steven,
It seems to me that you have absolutely no trust in her whatsoever. And if there's no trust this can't work. Even if you do get back together you will not be able to trust her having a myspace or any kind of web page. Which is BAD!
It also seems like IT DID mean something to her losing her virginity and having sex with her ex, because if it didn't mean anything, there would be nothing to regret.
I can't tell you how to deal with your jealousy but I can tell you to move on. True love doesn't flirt with other people, because Im pretty sure you wouldn't answer girls that hit you up on myspace the same way she did. You do have a reason to be insecure and if she doesn't understand that then is a problem.
Keep yourself occupied and go out more often. You'll meet new people and some day you'll get to experience the joy of having 100% trust in someone you're involved with.
AND YES YOU CAN LIVE WITHOUT HER. You were a month without her and you didn't die. And now you're single again and you're not dead Steven. You know what my concept is.
You guys will NEVER work out because of your trust issues, no matter how much you try not to feel them.
