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How to Deal with Jealousy/How to Make One Jealous/Is his jealousy actually signs of mistrust?


So, to make a long story as short as I can, my boyfriend of a year and a half seems to be highly jealous, even in ridiculous situations (eg: a friend everyone suspects is actually gay, he thinks this guy has a crush on me). A really good friend whom I had met in another continent and hadn't seen in 2 years came to visit me and she wanted to go out on the town, go to a bar and have a few drinks, just her and I. Now my boyfriend a) was upset because he didn't want me to go to the bar at all because "guys will hit on you" b) he wasn't specifically invited. On the same token, I sent him out with his friends so he couldn't dwell on what he viewed as a far more serious than it was in actuality.

He texted me at one point and told me to text him "all night" I told him I would text him when I could. He ended up getting mad ad by consequence getting drunk to the point of puking and passing out at his friends and then driving home after sending me a few texts that ruined a good portion of my evening.

So my question (maybe more than one) to you is how on EARTH do I deal with this or get past his jealousy? Is it actually jealousy or is it a lack of trust? Even though I've never given him any reason to have a lack of trust and he knows that fidelity is something I find incredibly important to me? Whichever it is, can I help him get over it? Please help!

Hello, Juliana.

I wrote an article on this issue. Please read as it should be a good first step on deciding how do deal with your jealous boyfriend:  



How to Deal with Jealousy/How to Make One Jealous

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I can answer questions regarding how to deal with one's own jealousy and how to deal with the jealosy of the partner / lover and how you can liberate yourself from this destructive emotion. Learn more about me and my work at


I overcome serious jealousy issues with conscious work and effort, and that was a very liberating experience. I also helped several people to abandon their jealous behavior and line of thinking.

M.A. in Philosophy

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