About PracticalHappiness.com Expertise I can answer questions regarding how to deal with one's own jealousy and how to deal with the jealosy of the partner / lover and how you can liberate yourself from this destructive emotion.
Learn more about me and my work at www.PracticalHappiness.com
Experience I overcome serious jealousy issues with conscious work and effort, and that was a very liberating experience. I also helped several people to abandon their jealous behavior and line of thinking.
Question Hi I'm 21 and my bf's 20 we've have been together a year this month. The other day I was at my bf's house and he was having a conversation with one of his friends about strip clubs. He was talking about how he use to go to this particular strip club alot when he was 17 and out of no where he ended up saying he made out with one of the strippers and got her number. Now, I know my bf and I were not together at the time we didn't even know each other back then but I got so angry and upset when I heard him say that. My bf knew I was upset not because he made out with someone but because it was a stripper and thats soooo gross and also i found this out a year into our relationship and i wish he would have said something earlier on. but he quickly apologized and said it happened 3 years ago and that he loved me and nobody else but me and that I was his everything and the best thing that has happened to him ....but I'm still upset that I know my bf has kissed a stripper in the past. It's like I see my bf as this amazing person "husband" type and now my perception of him has kinda changed since hearing this. Of course I have made out with other guys before I met my bf but never someone in a strip club. I just can't seem to shake it from my mind. I love my bf to death i could honestly see myself marrying him in the future and thats exactly why hearing the stripper story completely upset me I was even on the verge of saying we should break up which is crazy because it's not like he did it while we were together he did it before we even knew each other existed but it just hurts and i'll admit i can be a jealous person. I know while we have been dating for a year my bf has not been to strip clubs he said he would never cheat on me or do anything to hurt me but i'm still and have a hard time giving him my full trust because of the way guys have treated me in the past. My bf's my everything and a truly amazing man but when i hear things like strip clubs and him making out with strippers it makes me feel like he's just another typical loser guy. Help any advice would be great!!!!
Answer Hey, Jennifer. Thanks for your question. The key to overcoming your anger is in several important components. First, you must stop idolizing your boyfriend. HE IS NOT PERFECT AND HE NEVER WILL BE, JUST LIKE THE REST OF US.
Secondly, you must accept his male nature. Many men go to strip clubs and some of them kiss strippers. Here, it's his PAST. It's one small stage of his life and his evolvement into a more mature person. The sooner you let it go as history, the better off you will be.
So, throw that insignificant strip club incident out of your head as soon as you can and you will be much better off.
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