How to Deal With Relationships in the Workplace/my girlfriend and her Co worker


Ok here's my question, My gf and I love each other n all that good stuff but lately her Co worker has been making me uncomfortable. I recently.found out that they go to lunch (just the two of them) everyday n text each other throughout the entire night, now my gf admitted to thinking he was cute when she started but later said he was a conceded jerk, but even after saying this about him none of there habits have changed..and it's akward for me cause how do I tell her not to go to lunch with him anymore? I mean they work together on the same schedule so.of course I think of how akward it would be for her going back to work n all of a sudden treating him diff, please help!! What should I do? Should I be worried? (PS her Co worker has a gf to)

Hi Jeremy,

My opinion:  yes, you should be worried.  Going to lunch occasionally, no big deal.  Going to lunch together every day and texting throughout the night, red flags waving and screaming "not acceptable."  That the co-worker has a girlfriend is not relevant.  Your girlfriend has a boyfriend, but that's not stopping her from spending waaaaaaaay tooooooo much time with this guy.

Ask your girlfriend how she would feel if you went to lunch everyday with the same female co-worker and then texted back and forth with this young lady throughout the night.  If she says it would be okay with her, find another girlfriend.  If she refuses to knock off the daily lunches and all personal texts with her co-worker, find another girlfriend.

If your girlfriend really loves you, she will stop engaging in behavior that is hurtful to you, and she will not hesitate to put your feelings above creating an awkward situation with the co-worker.

Take care.  I wish you well.

Alice J. Bogert  

How to Deal With Relationships in the Workplace

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alice bogert


I can field questions related to employee-employee relationship issues as well as employee-manager relationship issues.


I supervised staff at the county and federal level for over 25 years. I have extensive experience dealing with employee disputes, management employee disagreements, morale issues, managing change, etc. I teach a variety of leadership and conflict resolution classes.

National Association of Retired Federal Employees, Business Women of America.

I have a Masters Degree in Sociology.

Awards and Honors
Three Quality Step Merit Awards for Excellence while employed with the federal government. Numerous awards for training classes I've done.

Past/Present Clients
Private industry, Los Rio Community College District, federal, state and county government

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