How to Deal with Sex Problems/too dry to have sex

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Question
I'm 46 yrs. old been married for 16 yrs. I never have this problem.  Has been 3 months now, every time we have sex, I was so dry I have to use gel to help.  My body have feeling wanting to have sex, but just too dry to do.

I would like to know what to do to help my body?

Answer
Hi Katie,

I am sorry to hear of your discomfort.

There are in general two reasons for a lack of moisture during intercourse.  Since this is a relatively sudden onset.  I think it is most likely an issue with hormones. A loss of estrogen can cause a thinning of the walls of the vagina and a reduction of the fluids associated with arousal.  Are you menopausal?   I suggest you see a doctor about this.   You might want to check into estrogen replacement.  You say you have used gels.  There are several that work well.  KY has several to choose from.

The other possibility, less likely because it is a recent issue is that you are not getting sufficiently aroused.  Menopausal or not you can try longer and more extensive foreplay to get more aroused and more moist.  There is a Hypnosis program that I like if the issue is more psychological, tenseness or anxiety.  Sexual enhancement - reaching orgasm for women

This assumes that there has not been anything traumatic happening in your life.

Good luck,

How to Deal with Sex Problems

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Tom Blair

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Sexual Relationship Coaching. Published author. I am comfortable answering questions dealing with most areas of sex.

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Sexual Relationship Coach Neural Linguistic Practitioner Hypnotherapist Internationally read author. Retired Educator All relationships are based on having certain needs being met. Healthy relationships are ones where there is a mutual meeting of these needs. Respect, honesty, communication are just some of those needs When those needs and others are not being met, the relationship will fall into disrepair. Together we will identify those needs and work to correct the imbalance. It is not too late, love can be rekindled. And it can last a life time.

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Sexual Relationship Coach Neural Linguistic Practitioner Hypnotherapist Internationally read author. Retired Educator

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