How to Deal with Sex Problems/Erection Problem


I am 35 years old virgin guy, recently I got married, I have serious problem that I can't have sex with my wife, sometimes in morning my penis get hard but whenever I try to sex with my wife my penis lose hardness and I can't have sex, it's been over two month and I am very confuse that why I can't have sex? Please note I have been masturbating for the last 12 year.

i went to doctor he said it is performance anxiety and he advised me to use Viagra 50 MG tablet, i used Viagra but did not work, the he referred me to urologist he checked my testosterone after blood test my testosterone level was normal. both doctors said i am medically fit so if i am normal and perfect that why i have erection problem why i can't maintain my erection?"

Hello Wassem,

The first doc was right.  Most likely either performance anxiety.  That is a psychological issue not a medical one.  Viagra is for a medical issue.  You get erections.  The problem is that when you about to have sex something in the back of your mind is telling you NO.  

There area couple of approaches you might try.

First is called the sensate method.  This is to get you comfortable in the sexual setting with your wife.   Agree that you are not going to have sex.   with both of you naked, spend a couple of hours getting to know each others bodies. Touch, kiss, lick, fondle every inch of your partners body.  She does the same to you.  First time NO SEX at all.  Second time only oral sex no penetration.  From then on if everything goes well you may have intercourse.

Besides helping you get over the anxiety, it is a lot of fun for both of you.

The other approach would be to get a therapist.  Hypnotherapists have had some really good results helping men gain sexual confidence.  I am sure you can find a hypnotherapist close to you.  Self hypnosis programs are also effective and cheaper.  I like these people

Don't worry, be happy,

How to Deal with Sex Problems

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Tom Blair


Sexual Relationship Coaching. Published author. I am comfortable answering questions dealing with most areas of sex.


Sexual Relationship Coach Neural Linguistic Practitioner Hypnotherapist Internationally read author. Retired Educator All relationships are based on having certain needs being met. Healthy relationships are ones where there is a mutual meeting of these needs. Respect, honesty, communication are just some of those needs When those needs and others are not being met, the relationship will fall into disrepair. Together we will identify those needs and work to correct the imbalance. It is not too late, love can be rekindled. And it can last a life time.

Sexual Relationship Coach Neural Linguistic Practitioner Hypnotherapist Internationally read author. Retired Educator

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