AboutJoan Schramm Expertise I can answer questions about handling difficult bosses or co-workers, motivation, team-building, and just getting along in an organization. I am also an expert on conflict resolution and communication as well as other issues dealing with business relationships.
Experience Joan is a professional Coach and the founder of Momentum Coaching, www.achieve-momentum.com. Her experience is from over twenty-five years of business leadership, training and coaching.
Organizations Coach Training Alliance, Coachville, Attractionville, 247 Coaching, Solo-E
Publications Many of my articles have appeared in local newspapers and online at sites like www.ezines.com, www.marketingseek.com, www.articlecity.com, www.exactseek.com and others.
Education/Credentials BS in English
MS in Human Resource Management
Certified Coach through the Coach Training Alliance
Question Hi Joan-
I am looking for advice on protocol. I have been employed by a small consulting firm for the past 4 years- we have very little oversight in terms of working hours, working from home etc. Its a nice situation that for the most part my colleagues don't abuse, and we have an established collective calendar that we use to keep track of people's whereabouts. We have regular monthly staff meetings scheduled on the same day each month; I have never missed one except when traveling. Until today- our monthly meeting was postponed for a week due to inclement weather and rescheduled for today, and I had a previously scheduled interview for a new job so I had a conflict. I tried to reschedule, but it wasn't possible as it was a group interview, exhaustive 5 hour affair, with lots of schedules to coordinate- so I didn't push it. I put my conflict on the group calendar as an "appointment", sent the boss an Email early in the morning that I would be out of the office most of the day, but would try to catch the end of the staff meeting. Well, of course the interview took longer than scheduled, and I missed the meeting completely. Most of the time staff meetings arent a big deal, mostly just catching up. But today they got into some issues and my presence was missed- its a small staff of only 8 people. Later in the day, I met with the boss on a project and he asked where I was- I said at a Dr. Appointment that was difficult to get and couldn't reschedule- basically a lie. I don't like lying, especially in the situation where it may be possible in a few days that I announce my resignation in which case the lie is revealed. I have a good relationship with the boss and I want it to continue whether or not I continue to work for him. OK so the ethics here are not clear to me- First, what would have been a better option? I tried to avoid lying by being vague about an "appointment". But then when asked a direct question about what the appointment was, I could have refused to answer (awkward) told the truth (not good if I don't get the job offer) or lied (questionable ethically). So what should I have done? And now that the lie has been told, what do I do now? Help!
Thanks!
Answer Richard --
OK, first of all, take a deep breath and calm yourself. You didn't do anything really horrible -- you're an honest, ethical person and lying bothers you. It bothers me, too, but sometimes it's inevitable. Ethical or not, you just can't go around telling your current boss that you were out of the office on an interview for another job. And, realistically, no one expects you to. It's just that little imp on your shoulder who's telling you that you're bad.
I think you did fine, considering that you were put on the spot. You could have simply stuck to "I'm so sorry -- I had a previous commitment that I couldn't change and it ran longer than I expected", but most of us (unless we're very good liars) don't think that quickly.
There's no reason why your lie has to come out. Even if you get the other job, there's nothing to say that you couldn't have been at a Dr appt like you said you were. If it were me, I'd stick to the story no matter what.
