About Estelle Expertise I am open to all sorts of questions about crushes - how to deal with them, how to find out whether he/she likes you, how to best handle the situation at hand. I will also try my best to help you analyze your case and see how likely he/she will answer your prayers!
WILL REJECT ALL QUESTIONS ABOUT SEX OR SEXUAL EXPERIENCES!
STATE AGE & GENDER IN YOUR QUESTION PLEASE.
Experience I have gone through quite a few crushes myself. Now that I am well and off in college, I feel like I can give some advice to peers or those younger than me. My friends often comes to me for advice on this subject matter as well. I have been able to guide both myself and my friends into great relationships. I am also a psychology major with a lot of interest in this topic. I am very eager to help those who have any questions.
Education/Credentials College major in Psychology.
Expert: Estelle Date: 6/28/2008 Subject: Is my mind tricking me or does he like me?
Question QUESTION: Ok, so theres this guy I really like; actually I've liked him for like 4 or 5 years now (we've been friends for about 9 years)were both 16 but I'm a month older,(not that, that matters much). My parents and his parents are best friends so when we were young he came over a lot; and he still comes over every now and then. Anyway moving on,
I absolutely adore him, I get butterflies whenever I see him or hear his voice... :) He is so hot (bright blue eyes, strong, slim,). I almost get depressed when I don't see him for a long period of time.
See I kept my crush a secret up until this year, and then I couldn't take it any more.So I had a friend ask him for me to see if he liked me. He told them as a friend. I thought that mabe he just didn't trust them well enough so I got up the courage to ask him myself;and so I texted him and told him his smile was amazing and I love his blue eyes. Then I asked him if he liked me only as a friend; he said Ya Why?
I felt kinda crushed after that and began to wonder if I could wait for him any longer or if it was a waste of air..
There's only one problem with this guy: he's really friendly and tons of girls like him and he's had like a load of girl friends. I have never dated and he's been my only crush ever. I can never tell if he likes me or if he's just that big of a flirt. Every now and then I decide that I'm sick of waiting for him so I don't text him or talk to him at all. When I do this he always asks if my phone is broke and why I don't text him anymore. So I come right back on the road I started on, and again I sit and wait. He also remembers silly things I tell him like my favorite color or band. He even started reading books(because he always sees me with a book in my hand.)
I need to know if he'll ever ask me out.(I can't wait for- ever.) I don't like asking guys out I prefer them to ask me. I need advice on what to do. Is there something I can say to him (without asking him out) that will get him to like me more. What could I do to make the first move (other than what I've already done)? Am I blinded because I like him so much, that I tricked myself into thinking he likes me back?
Signed: a princess waiting endlessly for her prince.
ANSWER: Greetings your Royal Highness Princess Sam!
So this Prince of yours sounds like he may be interested, but not enough to actually ask you out. To be brutally honest (please don't throw me in the dungeon), I personally don't think there is any way anybody can get another person to like them. If it clicks it clicks. What I do know is, you are an important part of his life. He kind of depends on you. His other friends can betray him, but he knows you won't- and that's really something!
Maybe it is because you are SO CLOSE to him that doesn't see you as a girl anymore, you become more of his guy friend than anything (even if you are the girliest girl ever). Guys are prone to such a symptom. So here's the cure: let him acknowledge that there is a difference between you two, you are a girl and he is a boy, you are NOT one of the guys. He must learn to see that if you ever wish for him to realize any deeper feelings he MAY have for you.
Give him some space. Let him know when you go on shopping trips with the GIRLS, etc., don't talk SO MUCH about it that he thinks you are getting too artificial and materialistic. I don't think he is a big flirt- popular guys tend to have a lot of girls hanging around him, it's only natural.
Let me know how it goes! Good luck, feel free to ask for followups.
Best wishes,
Estelle.
P.s. Please excuse all my princess jokes.
---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------
QUESTION: Hey Estelle,
Tell me honestly(since you don't know us exactly it might be a little hard but) do you think he actually has deeper feelings for me, or am I just another girl/friend?
Can you think of any other ways to let him know that I am a girl and he is a guy? (cause I do tell him were I'm going sometimes, not a lot just some.) I even started wearing make-up this year (mostly just mascara and eye shadow.)
Can't wait to hear your response,
Sam :)
P.S. here's a funny fact for you: A lot of his guy friends have had/do have a crush on me....
It gets better, my best friend and even a few distant ones have had a crush/do have a crush on him...
ANSWER: Hi Sam,
Wow sounds like the Prince AND Princess are much of a fanfare in the dating industry huh? Well no worries! I do think you are more important to him than his other female friends. Currently, I don't think he likes you (at least doesn't realize it), but that could be because of what I have explained before. Once he realizes that you indeed are a girl, he might come to his senses and like you!
As to how to make him think you are a girl- if he ever says anything that he would usually say to a guy, you can respond with something like "well, I don't know, I'm a girl after all, not a guy!" make the point clear and he might suddent have some kind of understanding.
Good luck! Keep me posted please! :)
Best wishes,
Estelle.
---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------
QUESTION: Hi Estelle,
Yesterday I was at a baseball game and so was my best friend and my prince. My best friend caught my prince checking me out and staring a bit. After the game I went home and all I could think about was him. I thought to myself, I'll give him his space, you know show him that I don't think about him all the time. I waited until 5:00 p.m. to text him. When he didn't respond I waited about a half an hour later and texted him back saying "all right maybe I'll talk to you later then." Then at like 10:30 p.m. I texted him Goodnight. He never responded. Today I text him at like 3:30 just asking "whats up?" no response. At 4:45 my mom wanted to know if his parents were home so she could call his mom and talk. (like I said before my mom and his mom are best friends.)It's like 6:00pm and still no response........ What should I do? Should I keep texting him like once a day? Or should I just stop texting him all together? When he asks why i don't text him should I tell him its because he never responds?
Answer Hi Sam,
STOP TEXTING HIM IMMEDIATELY! Or else you will come off as desperate and needy. It's one thing to ask him whats up once in a while (or maybe once a day IF he replies on a regular basis) but don't text him so often! Especially if he doesn't reply, then just drop it, or else it will blow your cover and all your effort of trying to make him think you don't think about him all the time.
So don't text him anymore until he initiates a conversation with you or something. If he doesn't mention your texts, don't bring it up immediately. Once you guys fall back into your casual routine and such you can bring up jokingly something like "hey did you ever get my texts the other day?" or "dude you never reply to my texts!". See how he responds. Sometimes guys just don't check their phone for hours. It happens. But STOP TEXTING HIM!
Let me know how it goes! And I'm so happy to hear from you again!
