About Amarie Expertise I can help with deciphering your feelings for a crush into easy to understand terms. I can
also help in telling which step is the best to take next with your crush. I understand,
probably better than most, just how confusing crushes can be. I have a real desire to help
people, especially when it comes to their love lives. My major is Psychology with a passion for marital and relationship counseling.
Experience Psychology major, founder of a peer counseling group
Education/Credentials Psychology major at UVA
Past/Present Clients clients through peer counseling are almost always anonymous.
Question There's this guy at work (I'm 18, he's 21) that I like very much. The only problem is that he's extremely shy and barely talks to anyone, especially girls, which is weird because he's also extremely attractive.
People tell me he may like me too as he talks to me sometimes and sits next to me at parties (we've been to two so far). He offered me a drive (and offered no one else), asked a friend for my number so he could ask me if I was going to a certain party, etc. At work however, he barely talks to me and it's very intimidating. Sometimes he doesn't even say hi! (he treats everyone that way at work) I'm not a shy person, but I find that I'm totally shy and self conscious around him. Now I feel like wherever I am, he is and I'm worried he thinks I'm following him :(
Does it sound like I have a chance? right now I'm trying to play it cool so I won't freak him out. What do you suggest?
Answer Hi Claire,
I suggest that in this case, you take charge of the situation just enough to really get his attention. In my opinion, he likes you but is too afraid to do something.
Most times, i'm an advocate of the man taking charge and "chasing" the woman but there are times when the woman has to step and give him the confidence to chase her. This is one of those times.
Go out of your way to talk to him. Even if its just simple things. Ask him how he's doing. If he replys, "fine"... push further. Ask him about his weekends, his nights... anything you can think of. Be charming when you talk to him. If you do this right, you're going to drive his mind crazy until he's forced to figure out what is driving your actions.
And don't worry if he thinks you're following him... heck, maybe he's following you! Be yourself around him.